Wednesday, June 25, 2014

Mrs. Hillbilly Mom Almost Sets A Precedent For Missouri

Today I went to a city doctor. According to my primary care provider, there are no doctors in Hillmomba who do the same work this doctor does. I cry shenanigans! What he meant was, perhaps, that no doctors in his network in Hillmomba do this job.

Anyhoo, there I was, not exactly layin' back in a satin dress, but certainly in a room where you do what you don't confess. Oh, what I would have given for a satin dress! Or any dress.

After the exam, the nurse took me to the conference room. "Are you here with anyone? Do you want them to come in?"

HM: "Yes. My husband. His name is Farmer H."

Nurse: "Okay. I'll go get him."

I heard her go out and call "Farmer H." The next thing I knew, I was like a display in a living history exhibit. A short, rotund lady (SRL) waddled to the door. She looked at me. She looked down the hall. She said, "Room One? There's somebody already in here."

Nurse: "I know. And I brought you in."

The short, rotund lady came back to look again. "I don't think I belong in here."

HM: "No. This is not my husband."

Nurse: "Well, what is your name?"

SRL: "Charmer Rach."

Nurse: "Oh! I called for Farmer H!"

Not that there's anything wrong with that, but I was certainly not prepared this afternoon to deal with my new wife.

3 comments:

  1. If you had a new wife, she might do some of your unfavorite jobs around the house (while she listens to Gordon Lightfoot).

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have always wanted a wife ..... a maid would charge too much.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sioux,
    If I had a new wife, she might warm food in the oven or heat it up in the microwave for me! While still listening to Gordon Lightfoot.

    ****
    Kathy,
    Plus, you don't have to buy that uniform.

    ReplyDelete