CUSsed If You Do, CUSsed If You Don't

Once again, Mrs. Hillbilly Mom is persona non grata around the old schoolhouse. Some of you might wonder how you missed that sliver of time when she WASN’T. I guess you blinked. So, what has Mrs. HM done now to earn the disapproving looks of her co-workers? Same stuff, different day.

On my way to duty this morning, I dropped by the office to—wait a minute. Let’s not be hasty. Let’s not put the cart before the horse, the beans above the frank.

This morning when I entered my classroom, the stench of yesterday’s hot steaming bowl of BO still saturated the atmosphere. There was the bowl, sitting on top of the trash. My room had not been cleaned. A few folded-up fragments of paper littered the gray-speckled white industrial tile. Since I had thirty minutes of duty fast-approaching, I had limited time to clean up before my pupils entered. I tied up that black trash bag and hauled it down the hall to one of the big gray industrial trash cans in the cafeteria.

I stopped by the office and stuck my head in. “I hate to be the squeaky wheel, but my room didn’t get cleaned last night. This is the second time. I don’t need a scrubbing, just the trash emptied and the floor swept.” The man in charge nodded. His helper looked at me like I’d just said that I was having a hot steaming bowl of BO for lunch. “The custodian must have just forgot.”

Let’s get this straight. If I didn’t mention this fact, my room would continue its unclean ways every couple of weeks. How is anybody to know if I don’t report it? Am I supposed to assume those duties as one of the ‘other responsibilities as needed’ from my contract?

Why am I the bad guy? It’s not like I stormed in there and threw the trash on the desk and demanded, “Off with that custodian’s head!” No. I simply provided information. Perchance to resolve the situation. I did not withhold the facts until the semi-sometimes-annual custodial evaluation form was put in my mailbox, then give low marks for the cleanliness of my room on assorted days. I was doing NewCus a favor, actually, because NewCus is scarcer than hen’s teeth, and I cannot mention it face to face without another face.

And the thanks Mrs. Hillbilly Mom gets for this good deed? That comment of, “Oh, the custodian must have just forgot.” Perceived by Mrs. HM as, “You hateful cow! How dare you complain that your room wasn’t cleaned! As if everybody should remember to do the job they are paid for every single day they work!”

How would it go over if Mrs. Hillbilly Mom simply forgot to go to her fifth hour class one day every couple of weeks? Huh? What then? Would Mrs. HM get the same excuse? “Oh, Mrs. Hillbilly Mom must have just forgot to teach her fifth hour.” I don’t think so. Would Mrs. HM get a gentle reminder that she is expected to teach ALL of her classes each work day? I don’t think so. Would NewCus be expected to teach Mrs. HM’s fifth hour class on those days she forgets? I don’t think so.

Why must Mrs. Hillbilly Mom be held to a higher standard? THAT is the question. Mrs. Hillbilly Mom refuses to be a Jill-of-Two-Trades.