Mrs. Hillbilly Mom has a problem.
STICKY BUNS!
Oh, not the bakery treat! Who would have a problem with THAT? No. Sadly, Mrs. Hillbilly Mom's sticky bun problem is not appetizing in the least.
I have a sneaking suspicion that the substitute custodial staff is mopping the toilet seat in the faculty women's restroom. You heard me! Something is sticky in the state of seatmark.
Here's the deal. Twice in the last two weeks, I have entered the faculty women's restroom to the strong scent of cleaning supplies. Sure, that would have been a shocker in itself back in the days when we had our old custodial staff. But now, the facilities are cleaned on a regular basis. Just not in this manner. I wonder if anybody else has had this issue. I will have to conduct an informal survey of the women faculty.
It's not as if the toilet seat is wet. I would surely notice that. No, the seat looks normal. There's a little bit of moisture on the floor. Like it was mopped, but the mop water hasn't evaporated yet. The seat is white. Appears dry. But there are sometimes spots like on crystal removed from a dishwasher when Cascade was not the detergent. Not that I know anything about crystal. Or dishwashers. But I watch TV commercials.
The problem is that when I place my rumpus on that seat, it STICKS. That's right. When I go to get up, it's like Flick trying to get his tongue off the frozen flagpole in A Christmas Story. That's NOT right! Buttocks should not stick to a toilet seat. Don't tell me to line it with toilet paper every time. Do you know how many women faculty are queued up outside that door at any given between-class-period time? We have four minutes. For ten of us at our end of the hall.
I don't know what else it could be. Surely my fellow faculty are not dripping and befouling the seat. If this were the case, it would happen consistently. Not every now and then when we have a substitute custodial staff.
I don't know about you, but Mrs. Hillbilly Mom does not need a Lysol astringent to make her feel fresh.
I hope you don't get so stuck that you have to have the fire department rescue you.
ReplyDeleteSometimes the jaws of life take a bite out of things they're not supposed to...
Sioux,
ReplyDeleteACK! It happened again after school today. And I was SURE that the butts of other victims would have polished that seat clean by the time I got there.
THE HORROR! I never thought about getting STUCK stuck. You're giving me a phobia.