Did I mention once upon a time that Farmer H was almost shot twice in one week? I'm sure I did, here or there. It was a few years ago, when he asked a new property owner to remove his junk (like an old garage door) off our upper property. He did not so much ask as leave a note.That's because nobody answered when he knocked on the door, even though a curtain moved. "Would you please move this over onto your property and off of ours? Here is my name and address."
That upset me, because he just flat out told that guy where we live! Farmer H could have just as easily left his phone number on that note.
Anyhoo...Farmer H returned to find even more junk on our side of the property line. He kept going by (it WAS on the road out of here that Farmer H takes to and from work) until he saw the guy in the garage. He parked in our road and asked the guy if he could move the stuff. That got him a royal cussing.
"I'll put my stuff anywhere I want to put it, and you're not going to stop me. Come back here again, and I'll shoot you!"
Even Farmer H knew it was time to make an exit. So he came home and called the county sheriff, who sent a deputy to take a report, in which Farmer H declared that he didn't want to shoot nobody, but if that guy came down here on his property, he WOULD! Lucky for us Farmer H didn't get locked up. And that the neighbor guy up by the other property did, for threatening to shoot the deputy. Anyhoo...that is just the lead-in to a story last week when I came home from jury duty and told Farmer H that about a fourth of our jury pool declared they had a gun pointed at them.
"Like you, I guess."
"I didn't have no gun pointed at me."
"Oh. That's right. The guy only THREATENED to point one at you, and pull the trigger. And that same week, those teenage boys actually shot at you and hit the roof of your cabin, but maybe they didn't point their gun at you."
"Yeah. Oh, the #1 son pointed a gun at me. That Airsoft gun."
"Because you TOLD him to! AND you told him to shoot you."
"Yeah. We were trying to see how much it hurt."
I have no words.
I've done a couple of stupid things like that, so I'm not going to dis Farmer H.
ReplyDeleteHowever, it does sound you lucked out when you didn't get chosen for the jury. Isn't there a character on "Orange is the New Black" called "Crazy Eyes"?
Sioux,
ReplyDeleteYou've been shot at? I guess (attempted) dog-stealing isn't all it's cracked up to be!
Don't know about that character. I don't have Netflix. In fact, until I consulted my estranged BFF Google, I thought it was Netflicks. The Pony would be smacking his forehead with his palm, saying, "That's so sad."