Ponyless Monday

Have I mentioned how much I miss The Pony?

Today was one of those days when I missed him most, having to deal with The Devil's Playground all alone. He used to happily trot over to the cart corral and pick out a cart for me to push into the store. Shh...we're not discussing how I use it as a walker. And we're not discussing that time The Pony returned the cart after shopping, and rode it right into the side of the corral.

Today I picked out my own cart, proving that I am in the lower echelon of cart-choosers. I knew by the time I got past the opening display of Halloween candy that I had made a bad decision. But I didn't want to go back. There are only so many steps per day in my contrary knees, and it was worth struggling with a cart that veered to the left rather than go back for a different one.

The Devil was out of sliced French bread. And sliced Italian bread, unless you wanted the kind with all those spices sprinkled on top, which I did not. A worker with a produce cart monopolized the slaw mix/lettuce area, so no slaw mix for Mrs. Hillbilly Mom this week. Don't worry. I got a pint of actual slaw in the deli. I looked for a bag of frozen fajita veggies, which I KNOW I've bought before. Now, they're apparently calling them Three Color Pepper and Onion Strips. I wanted a couple of frozen dinners for when I don't want a full meal while Farmer H is otherwise occupied, but a worker with a cart was pulling Banquets from the shelves. I snagged a couple of Great Value Salisbury Steak while his back was turned. I had to root around on the back of the shelves for fresh buns and Nutty Oat bread. No. I'm NOT going to buy the ones that expire in three days.

I kept seeing teenage kids in there! It's a school day, people! At 10:50 on a Monday morning! These kids should be in school! Nobody I know cancels school for Columbus Day. I haven't had Columbus Day off since I worked for the State of Missouri! Well. And now.

On the chip aisle, I was sad to see that there was no 12-pack of individual White Cheddar Grooved Cheez Its. They had 'em two weeks ago. Or maybe three. I bought them for Farmer H to snack on. He never opened them. But I did. And we're down to only 5 packs left! It was hard to see the Cheez Its, because a worker man in a tie pulling a stock cart moved from the Ritz to there, where he met a long-lost friend, and they were busy slapping shoulders and shaking hands and blocking my view, plus that lady who darted in front of me to grab a box of 12 regular individual Cheez Its for her elementary age son, who should have been in school!

I stopped along the back aisle for the bathroom, but somebody was in the handicapped stall, which I like to use because of the pull bar to hoist my contrary knees into standing position again. So I headed on to the pharmacy area to score some Vicks VapoRub. Of course wives and husbands were standing in my way on the main aisle talking to each other, like they can't do that crap at home!

On the way out of the Playground, I passed a woman stocking the stuffed animal grabber machine. Alas, my little Pony! You always had such good luck with grabbing. I loaded the groceries in T-Hoe's rear by myself. Returned the cart by myself (without riding on it or crashing). Washed my hands with Germ-X by myself. Went home and carried them in by myself. And put them away by myself.

I really miss my little Pony.

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Let the record show that the garden center already has Christmas trees up and decorations on the shelves.