Thank The Gummi Mary, It Was Not Benjamin Raspail's Head

Two weeks ago the #1 Son called to tell me a curious development concerning his new apartment. You may recall that he recently moved from his five-bedroom college house to a two-bedroom apartment, since three of his housemates will be graduating in six weeks.

We were actually discussing something else, I think. Perhaps an item he forgot that I needed to work on his tax return. (Yesterday he mentioned that some of the guys in his class were talking about when they were going to get their tax refunds. One said, "My mom's accountant did mine." And another guy said, "My mom's bookkeeper did mine." And #1 said, "My mom and TurboTax did mine.")

Anyhoo...#1 mentioned, on that phone call, that he had to call the property management group about his garage.

"I didn't know you had a garage! You and your dad never mentioned a garage."

"Well...I haven't been able to use it yet, because there's no garage door opener. The last people to move out didn't return it. That was last May. This unit hasn't been rented until now. That's usually how it goes. If they can't rent it by August, they're unlikely to find anyone to take it until the next school year. That's how I got it now, before everyone moves home."

"You mean you HAVE a garage, but you can't USE the garage? I'd be asking for a partial refund on my rent!"

"I called the property people this morning, and asked again about my garage. They said they'd just had a guy out here to make a new garage door opener. So I checked, and the garage was open, and there's a CAR in it!"

"You should get to keep it! Finders keepers! You've got a new car!"

"I don't WANT it! It's a 1990s model Nissan, with a FOR SALE sign in the back window. It's probably not even worth a thousand dollars. I guess the people who were moving were trying to sell it and couldn't, so they just left it here to get rid of it."

"What's going to happen to it now? It's taking up your garage that you haven't been able to use but are paying for."

"Oh, the property people will have to get it towed. There's a car seat and some blankets and some junk in the garage, too. The property people are supposed to clean it out, now that they got it open."

As of yesterday's information garnered from #1, the car is gone, but he's not parking in the garage.

"I'm just using it for storage right now. I don't have as much room as I had in the house. So I've got boxes in there. Besides, if I park in the garage, somebody will park in front of it and block me in. There are overflow spaces here, plenty of parking, but people are used to parking in front of that garage. It's easier not to put my car in it."

Like his college liver, I have a feeling that #1's college car does not receive much tender loving care.