Just When You Think It's Safe To Go Back In The Gas Station Chicken Store

You may recall that I only recently recovered from the trauma of NO DIET COKE at The Gas Station Chicken Store from July 18 to July 25. Sweet Gummi Mary! The outage lasted almost as long as the beef between DISH and the local CBS affiliate. Except that one's still not over, much to my Big-Brother-loving chagrin.

Anyhoo... I'd once again fallen into my routine, skipping gaily into TGSCS between noon and 1:00, to fill a 44 oz foam cup with my magical elixir. No more roughing it at Orb K with a Polar Pop, in their too-slim cups that tip over easily. I was on top of the world, had it by the tail, it was my oyster.

REEEEE!

That's the sound of a needle scratching across a phonograph record, in case some young whippersnapper is reading this instead of taking a selfie making ducklips. Mrs. HM's gay skipping screeched to a halt on the back aisle of TGSCS, beside the rack of flaming hot chips. What kind of trick was this? The Diet Coke spigot was perfectly normal. No sign made from a snippet of notebook paper proclaiming OUT. So there was magical elixir inside the soda fountain. But the hole for the 44 oz foam cups was EMPTY! And a snippet of notebook paper taped underneath said

OUT OF 44 OZ CUPS. MORE TOMORROW.

I felt faint. This couldn't be happening! I was there. I was ready for my 44 oz Diet Coke. I looked in the cardboard box at the end of the soda fountain counter. Many a time, I've foraged in there for a 44 oz cup when the display was out. But NO! The cardboard box was bereft of 44 oz cups! Not even the misshapen barrel kind to be had!

With my vision growing wavy like a bad sitcom flashback transition, I made a snap decision. I clutched my $5 scratcher winner in my left hand, and my two quarters, one nickel, four pennies, and one dime stacked in my right hand, and turned on my heel and left TGSCS. Not gaily skipping.

Of course I went over to Orb K, which is on my route home, just through the stoplight, under the overpass, and through the other stoplight. At least I'd only have to wait one day to resume magical elixiring.

Tuesday, I rounded the flaming hot chip display at TGSCS, and saw THE SAME THING! It was like Groundhog Day! The movie, not my best old ex-teaching buddy Mabel's favorite holiday. Only this time, I had a $15 scratcher winner in my left hand. The line wasn't long, so I decided to stay and cash in my tickets. (Didn't win anything on the new ones.)

The Woman Owner was working the second register, and waited on me. She said that she was SO SORRY, but the cups were due in that very day, and were late, because they'd seen the truck driving back and forth in front of the store WITHOUT STOPPING! I told her if I'd known that, I'd have been out there flagging them in.

Wednesday, THE CUPS WERE BACK! The Woman Owner was working alone. As I set my 44 oz Diet Coke down on the counter, I said, "Finally, I've got my soda again!" In a happy way. Not shaming her. Not at all.

Woman Owner said the whole problem was due to a new supplier. The old company had abruptly gone out of business, firing all their employees without notice on the previous Wednesday, and not telling their retailers. So I couldn't even blame the Man Owner for this outage.

He would have given me my soda for free, though...