Mrs. HM was not born yesterday. She did not just topple off a turnip truck. Nobody pulls the wool over her eyes. Farmer H continues to try.
When we have Chinese food, Farmer H eats his on a blue plastic plate. We've had them for over 20 years. They are like picnic plates, with a section for the main course, and two smaller sections for the sides. Every time, I caution Farmer H NOT to rinse his plate with cold water. You know what cold water does to the grease on plastic. It just turns it into grease with a wet coating on top.
Every time, I come to the kitchen to find that shiny wet plastic plate. Might as well just set it there greasy as to go to the trouble to wet it.
This time, I was sitting at the kitchen table when Farmer H tried his shenanigans.
"Don't you DARE run cold water on that greasy plate!"
"I'm not. I'm using hot water."
Farmer H turned on the water. It's a single lever, put in by Farmer H himself when he built the house in 1997. As with many items built by Farmer H, the water lever is a bit off. Meaning that where most houses built by reputable contractors have their cold water on the right, and hot water on the left... our kitchen sink requires the lever to be pushed RIGHT for the HOT water, and LEFT for the COLD water. Farmer H had turned on the water by pushing the lever to the left.
"Nice try. That's COLD water!"
"Oh. Is it?"
So quick to play dumb, our Farmer H. He is the one who put in that lever. And has been living here for the past 25 years using it. He also knows that it takes two minutes at minimum for the water to get hot when you turn it on. I have complained to him about it every time I wash the dishes.
After less than 30 seconds, Farmer H put his plate under the running water and started swishing it around.
"HEY! I know that water isn't hot yet!"
"Yes it is!"
"So if I come over there and put my hand in it, and the water isn't hot, you owe me a hundred dollars."
"What? That's crazy. I don't owe you no hundred dollars."
Said Farmer H as he quickly turned off the faucet and set his wet greasy plate beside the sink.
Did I mention that Farmer H might be seeking new accommodations in a structure commonly occupied by canines?
He must think you are as gullible as he is. My hot water takes a while to come through too, the heater is way out the back of the units and my kitchen is at the front.
ReplyDeleteRiver,
ReplyDeleteLike I used to tell my students: "I'm not as dumb as you want me to be!" Our water heater is in the basement. Maybe it also has something to do with the size of the water pipes Farmer H installed. The shower heats up faster, and the bathroom sink. But they are also closer to the water heater end of the house.
Why do they think we are stupid? We have a trip coming up and I have told him at least 12 times to put the drinking water hose in the RV. He swears it is already in there. We have two, a 25' and a 50'. I used the 25' to extend the garden hose by the house. I asked him if he had any more hose anywhere because I thought I gathered up more than 2. I needed it for the gardens up on the embankment. He gave me the 50' camping hose. We bought a 100' garden hose two weeks ago and I keep telling him to employ the new hose to get the hose necessary for camping and PUT IT IN THE CAMPER. Brought it up again today and he still says the hose is there, in the hold in the camper. Did he LOOK? No. Want to bet on whether we have a hose on board when we get to the first campground?
ReplyDeleteKathy,
ReplyDeleteYou need to lead him by the hand, and make him look in the hold with you standing right there! He can make up whatever excuse he wants, but will have to get the hose!
Yeah! What she said^ Don't be caught camping without a hose.
ReplyDelete