Trying To Kill Me Again

Farmer H is sick. I was actually kind of worried about him on Sunday morning. He was moving slower than Uncle Joe at the Shady Rest Hotel. He's not been feeling good for a couple weeks. The doctor he thinks might solve the issue can't see him until the 29th. So he's hobbling around on his next-to-last legs. In fact, he's been saying his legs ache. Then mentioning that he's been up and down a ladder working at Back-Creek Neighbor Bev's new place all last week. So I thought that might explain it.

 

For a couple days, I've been asking Farmer H if he has a cold. No. Of course not. According to HIM. He just sneezes a bunch of times after eating. And he coughs every morning when he gets up. 

 

Sunday morning, his cough in the shower sounded different. But he denied it. Off he went to his Storage Unit Store, with plans to go from there to Lowe's to get materials needed on Monday to work on Bev's house. So he thought he'd be home around 5:00 or 6:00 to grill our leftover pork steaks from when I was denied having a whole one on Mother's Day.

 

At 1:30, the kitchen door rattled for five minutes, like it does when Farmer H is trying to find the right key.

 

"I don't know why you don't just hang the house key around your neck!"

 

"Well. I couldn't find it."

 

"So you're not going to Lowe's?"

 

"No. I'll do it on Monday. I'm just beat. I didn't feel like going now. I'm going to sit down and watch the race."

 

I heard the sound go off on the TV.

 

"So you're not watching the race?"

 

"I'm resting. Resting my eyes."

 

"So... sleeping."

 

"Yeah."

 

After an hour, Farmer H said, "I think I'll go down and sit in your Old People Chair. Use the vibrator."

 

"I don't care." (Because, you know, it is OUR chair!)

 

When I left for town, Farmer H was vibrating away, covered by my fleece throw I won at my sister the ex-mayor's wife's Christmas Eve party. When I returned, he was at the BARn looking for stuff he needs at Bev's. When he returned to the Mansion, he was WAY more nasally than when I left.

 

"I'm pretty sure you're sick. You've caught something."

 

"Yeah. I think maybe I have. I took two Alka Seltzer Plusses."

 

"Are you supposed to take that many?"

 

"Yeah..."

 

Farmer H grilled, and ate his supper, and went to bed by 7:00. With plans NOT to work on Bev's house Monday. Meaning he will be here in the bed blowing his breather air on me longer than usual. I might see if I can find room to get in The Pony's old room, and use his old bed.

 

I don't wish Farmer H to be ill, but I also don't wish him to kill me. It's enough that he left me to try and put on my own bandage over my leg hole...