On Tuesday night, I fell asleep on the short couch. Oh, not lying down like a normal person. Sitting. One minute I was watching TV, at 4:50 a.m., waiting to see if the Naked and Afraid couple made it to their extraction point in Ecuador. It was Fernando, and that vegetarian gal, Dani. Both were on the show for their 3rd time.
Welp! I'll never know, because I woke up at 6:30 a.m. It was light outside. Farmer H had already left the Mansion. I was a bit perturbed that he hadn't even stopped to wake me as he walked behind the short couch. Of course this was mentioned later that afternoon, when I had to bump up the "This is the time of day we discuss the most recent thing you've done wrong" session, due to Farmer H's plans to attend that Beauty and the Beast play at the local junior college.
"What in the Not-Heaven? You just walked out and left me sleeping on the couch?"
"No. When I came out of the bedroom, I saw you there, with your eyes closed and your mouth hanging open. I thought you might be dead."
"So you just left me there???"
"No. I put my hand in front of your mouth, and felt some air on it. Then you jumped. So I knew you were still alive. THEN I left."
Yeah. That's my Prince Charming. I'm pretty sure he was disappointed at my survival. And that's why he chose to eat Taco Bell on the way home from the play at 10:00 p.m.
Well, then, he made sure you were alive before he left. If you had not been alive, wonder what he would have done?
ReplyDeleteKathy,
ReplyDeleteHeh, heh! He probably would have left anyway, figuring I couldn't get any deader! Don't you think that a NORMAL person might poke a shoulder, call your name, ask if you're getting up? Then again, Farmer H is NOT a normal person.
At least he checked to see you were still alive. That's something.
ReplyDeleteHe was being extra thoughtful... and he got trouble because of it. For shame, for shame, for shame.
ReplyDeleteSince you are always so tired because you're reTIRED, Farmer H has learned that you don't like to be disturbed in the morning hours. (You like to rise by 11 or later, right?) He tried to do that--to not disturb you.
Poor Farmer H. He's damned if he does (try to leave without waking you up) and damned if he doesn't (leave without shaking you/poking you). What's a man to do?
River,
ReplyDeleteYes, there's that...
***
Sioux,
I'll tell you what a man's to do, Madam, and that's MOVE IN WITH YOU! Because you are so understanding and appreciate the thoughtfulness that is Farmer H personified.
I'm always tired because I'm TIRED OF FARMER H. And because I go to bed at 6:00 a.m. when I don't accidentally fall asleep, and five hours of snoozing just ain't cuttin' it.
How silly of me to expect more of a sense of urgency when Farmer H thought I was dead. So selfish for an assumed corpse to only think of herself.