Good thing I go to the store twice a week, or you'd have nothing to read about. Back at Country Mart on Sunday, loading up on bananas, those mysterious potato-tomatoes, frozen french fries, some deli items, and buns and hamburgers... I pushed my cart up to the end of the checkout line.
The Old Lady Checker who used to be kind of mean to me came out from her station at the short checkout. She's nice to me now, like we're best buddies. She went past me with a nod, to the little old lady in front of me with a heaping cart.
"Ma'am? I can check you out over here. Just bring your cart."
The LOL was as spindly frail thing. As opposed to a spindly hearty thing. Her neck was like that of a cartoon vulture. You know how it dips down and then back up, in a U shape. Spindly had a world-class dowager's hump. I could have played ring toss on her neck if I had some of those wooden cross-stitch ring things that could fit over her head. Anyhoo... Spindly started to back up like an anemic turtle.
"Pick that up! It's not mine. But would you pick it up?"
"Sure." Old Lady Checker retrieved something off the floor and put it back on the snack shelf. She squeezed through between my cart and Spindly's, giving me a conspiratorial wink.
Spindly was busy trying not to knock over the end cap. She had plenty of room beside my cart. After all, Old Lady Checker had squeezed between us, and she's not svelte.
I continued to the line where she'd been waiting. It was the young Potato Tomato Guy. An older woman ahead of me was joshing with him. He said,
"I DO know the saying, 'Happy wife, happy life.'"
Heh, heh. He's gonna be just fine. Once he learns the difference between potatoes and tomatoes. I warned him when he picked up my three GIANT BAKERS and grabbed his chart, that they were the same as last time, $1.29. He chuckled and said,
"You really had me confused!"
As if I had anything to do with it! Anyhoo... he was really friendly and did a good enough job. As I left, I heard Old Lady Checker asking Spindly if she needed help loading her groceries. She did.
"Oh, let me send Potato Tomato Guy out with you! He's got less girth than me!"
So he left his checkout line to go load Spindly's groceries in her car. They're really friendly there at Country Mart. Except for a certain deli manager...
You have adventures every time you go to the store. Most of us do our shopping without anything interesting happening. I wonder why YOU rate such exciting times?
ReplyDeleteSioux,
ReplyDeleteI blame my Weirdo Magnet.
Great to hear about a nice shopping experience once in a while.
ReplyDeleteRiver,
ReplyDeleteIt's fun to HAVE a nice shopping experience once in a while!
You had me laughing as I put my hand to my neck to check on the development of my own turkey waddle!
ReplyDeleteKathy,
ReplyDeleteHeh, heh! Not my intention to point out the advanced ages of my readers! After all, one of those cashiers put MY age as 88! It's enough to make me think twice about buying Farmer H's liquor.