Farmer H has been complaining all year about the loss of his vest. It's a Carhartt version, with a fleece lining, kind of a greeny-gray canvas exterior. Every cold-weather week, he'd have a different idea about where he left it. Maybe at the auction, on the back of his chair. Or at his friend's house when he went every day to let her little dog out while she was in the hospital, and died unexpectedly. Earlier this week, he thought maybe he'd left it at school last year when he changed out of his Santa costume after the breakfast with the Parents As Teachers kids.
Farmer H is not the only loser! Mrs. HM had a Not-Heaven of a time searching for the flat green plastic containers in which her best old ex-teaching buddy Mabel gifts her with homemade chocolate-covered cherries every Christmas. In fact, she had to inform Mabel that she couldn't find those containers anywhere, this very day when they met for lunch. Don't worry! Mabel is an improvisor! She put those cherries in last year's Chex containers.
A couple hours after we returned from our Mabel lunch, I was at the kitchen table stuffing money into cards for the families of HOS (Farmer H's Oldest Son) and The Veteran. Farmer H was puttering around near the St. Louis Blues bathroom. The boys' bathroom that he had decorated with hockey memorabilia for Genius. The Pony had no preference for the decor where he pooped and peed.
"Guess what I just found!"
"I don't know... more Chex containers?"
"MY VEST! It's MY VEST! I carried something into Genius's room, and there it was! It's been there the whole time!"
"Heh, heh! You idiot!"
I stood up to throw away the package that the money cards came in. As I turned from my chair to round the kitchen peninsula, something caught my attention from the corner of my eye. I turned left, and noticed the cardboard box that sits on the kitchen stool under the cuckoo clock. A three-pack of Puffs With Lotion sits on top of the box. But under the edge of the Puffs, I saw MABEL'S CHERRY CONTAINERS!
What are the odds, people? For Farmer H to find his year-lost vest, and Mrs. HM to find the containers she had just told Mabel were unfindable since last Christmas.
Two Blind Morons, Two Blind Morons
See how they search. See how they search
One froze all winter for lack of a vest
One almost lost treats for no vessel, no less
Did you ever see two such losers, confess
Two Blind Morons, Two Blind Morons.
When ever we have something like that happen, we always say we should go buy a lottery ticket while our luck is running good. But, you buy scratch offs so often, maybe it just means you will get a big winner today? Ranee (MN)
ReplyDeleteRae,
ReplyDeleteI DID have a good winner! A $50 winner. But I bought it BEFORE we found our items, and scratched it after the discoveries. So I guess it was meant to be my lucky day. Oh, no! Maybe I should have gone back to town for another ticket, heh, heh! Anyhoo... I have other chances. I bought enough tickets so I'd have them on Thursday and Friday, because I'm not getting out in this weather of single digits and -35 wind chill!
I have a similar but opposite problem. I give away to thrift stores things that I haven't used in YEARS! Then a few months later I suddenly need something and have to buy new.
ReplyDeleteI've seen those Carrhart vests on google, they're pretty nice.
River,
ReplyDeleteThe containers were just in a box that sits there and is not in the way. I have put new 3-packs of Puffs on it throughout the year, and used them as needed, without noticing what was in the box under them!
I don't know if I bought the vest for Farmer H, or if he finally bought himself some clothing that wasn't from Goodwill. I've bought him nice Carhartt jackets over the years. The boys had them, too. They are a canvas material, with a quilted lining. Very warm, and they wear well. The boys outgrew them before they wore out, and we gave them to people who needed kids' jackets.
I still have boxes to unpack and search for my cutlery! It will be in the last box I rip open!
ReplyDeleteKathy,
ReplyDeleteYou always find things in the last place you look!