The Hillmomba Bean Spoon Wars

The first night we were about to partake of the most delicious pot of beans I've ever concocted, there was a minor skirmish over the serving method. Farmer H takes his food to his recliner to watch TV, and I usually wait a couple hours, what with my nocturnal schedule seeing me have breakfast at noon:30.

I set everything out that Farmer H would need. The plate, the bowl, the spoon, the knife. 

I had his diced onions ready, and the diced Mild Banana Pepper Rings. The corn muffins were loosened in the muffin pan. The butter had been set out to soften. The dipper was laid beside the pan for ladling beans into the bowl.

I went out of the way, to the table and HIPPIE, to allow Farmer H free movement between cutting block and stove. Out of the corner of my eye, I sensed him buttering his corn muffins. Crumbling one into the bottom of the bowl, and adding onions and peppers. After he had dipped his beans, and was getting his soda out of FRIG II, I went to move the pan and put the lid on until I was ready for supper.

WHAT IN THE NOT-HEAVEN!!!

"Uh. Why is the dipper still clean?"

"I didn't use it."

"How did you get your beans out?"

"With the spoon that was laying there."

"You might as well have used one of those flat boards for stirring paint! How can you dip beans with a spoon like that?"

"It worked fine for me."

"Yeah. Because all you got was beans and ham, and not any juice! Just like your towering bowl of soup."

"I ain't got a towering bowl of soup. I have beans and ham."

Indeed. Higher than the sides of the bowl, piled up in the middle like the mashed potato mountain in Close Encounters of the Third Kind. It's not so much that I begrudge Farmer H his ham and beans without juice. I actually LIKE the juice, so more for me. It gets thicker every time I warm them. 

It's just the idea of somebody [FARMER H] thinking it's normal to dip ham and beans out of a pan with a flat spoon that I used for stirring. The amount of beans in Farmer H's bowl would have taken about 3 dippers. I have no idea how many flat spoons that would be. I'm surprised Farmer H's arm was not in a sling from the extra effort.

Seriously. Which utensil would a normal person choose to dip beans out of a large pot? I suppose I should be thankful that I didn't catch Farmer H using that blue spoon to EAT from his bowl of beans.