Now All The Baby Steps Are Going Backwards

Just when I thought I was making some progress in training Farmer H to be kitchen-efficient... he has had a major relapse!

We had Casey's Pizza for supper on Friday, with leftovers for two more days. Farmer H usually warms his leftover pizza in the microwave. I prefer mine in the oven. Makes it seem like it just came out of... um... an OVEN, heh, heh! One evening Farmer H had come home late from an auction, while I was getting my own supper ready, and I offered to put his pizza in the oven with mine. Well. That was certainly a mistake! Because he saw the difference.

Anyhoo... there are two parts to this tale. Two major steps backwards in the training of Farmer H.

Friday evening, he came in carrying the pizzas. Set the boxes on the cutting block, taking up all the room there, when I've told him for years to set them on the stove. Farmer H went out to check on Lucky. To pet him and give him some "treats" from a baggie of ham chunks I had set on the counter for that purpose. I moved the pizzas over to the stove, where the cardboard boxes could "breathe" a little sitting over the burner coils, and not sweat from sitting on flat wood of the cutting block.

Farmer H came back in, and went straight to his pizza. He got his own plate. I had already torn off a paper towel for him, not wanting him to hold onto the top of the roll with his wet dirty hands after washing them. Well! Farmer H fooled ME! He didn't wash his hands! As he was walking into the living room with his plate, I called after him:

"THIS is why I don't want you putting your hands in food I'm going to eat! You were petting that dog, and handing out old ham, and didn't wash your hands before you touched your pizza!"

"Huh. My hands are clean enough."

Not even the common sense to be ashamed!

Anyhoo... On Saturday evening, I was already sitting at the table with my scratchers when Farmer H came home. He was puttering around, wet from the downpour, going out to check on Lucky. I figured he would warm his own pizza when he was ready. But I just had to ask...

"So, you're going to microwave your pizza when you come back?"

"Well... unless you want to warm it in the oven."

"I don't really want to, because I just sat down with my tickets. It's not hard. Even you could do it! 350 degrees, for 10 minutes."

"But I don't know how."

Sweet Gummi Mary! It's not like he was performing brain surgery! Or re-wiring a house. Or cutting off a MACK truck trailer, adding hydraulics, and turning it into a dump truck. It was just turning on an oven, putting pizza on a pan, putting the pan in the oven, and setting a timer for 10 minutes!

Of course that was beyond the capabilities of Farmer H. So I did it while he was outside. Let the record show that he did NOT wash his hands when he returned. Maybe the rain cleaned them a little.