Saturday, November 8, 2014

No Good Deed Goes Un Not-Happymaking

You know what would probably make a teacher really kind of not-happy after school on a Friday afternoon?

If she put off making copies before school because she had only 15 minutes before her duty started, and put off making those copies on her plan time 4th hour because two other teachers had been ruling the Kyoceras the first half of those lunch shifts, and then during the second half, a particularly vociferous fellow had taken up residence at the table in the teacher workroom.

Oh, but the mere act of staying after on a Friday afternoon is not enough to make a teacher really kind of not-happy. Nothing wrong with peacefully setting both Kyoceras in motion with papers for two different subjects, walking from one to the other to take off a stack and insert new originals. Nothing wrong with tearing open a ream of paper and setting it on the little staging table by the restrooms, waiting for one or another Kyocera to run dry. Nope. Nothing related to not-happiness there.

But what might make a teacher really kind of not-happy would be if a newcomer came in carrying a single piece of paper, eyeing the spoken-for Kyoceras. So a teacher using those Kyoceras might politely ask, "Do you need to make a copy?" Because that's what polite co-workers do. "This one here will be done first. If you need to run a copy."

"I have a lot of copies to make." Which may seem like a simple statement of fact, but more likely sounds to that teacher like a passive-aggressive attempt to shame her into giving up a copier.

"I know what you mean. I'm running a lot of copies. It's the first time I could get to the copiers all day." Which establishes that she was here first, and has rightful claim to both of those copiers, because WHO IN THE NOT-HEAVEN COMES IN AT 3:30 ON A FRIDAY TO MAKE COPIES?

"I could let you use this one when that set is done. It seems to be going really slow today." Which is the teacher doing that guy a favor, really. Because in the teacher workroom, possession of the copier is ten-tenths of the law, and a bag of chips.

"It's slow? I really have a lot of copies." Which is that dude alluding to the fact that the kindhearted teacher should actually let him use the fast machine.

"Slow. But it IS working." Which is the teacher sticking it to the dude, thumbing her nose, without the nyah nyah business.

So both parties stand their ground at their respective Kyoceras, neither giving an inch, until the slow Kyocera runs out of paper. And the dude grabs the stack of 500 sheets that the teacher has already unwrapped.

"Oh. Go ahead and use that. I unwrapped it because I knew one of the machines would run out while I was copying." And the dude DOES use it. And acts like the teacher is being all pissy by giving him permission to use a stack of paper he found on the staging table already unwrapped.

A pupil passes by. Looks into the room. Goes past. Comes back. Is invited in by the dude. Makes small talk about maybe he can do it right this time. At which point the teacher, who had no desire to spend personal time in the TEACHER WORKROOM with a STUDENT, notes that the very large stack of copies on the dude's Kyocera is near to blocking the slot that shoots them out.

"Oh. You might want to take some of that stack off. Because sometimes that machine will fold the copy on itself, and then it jams." Which was just the teacher trying to keep that Kyocera from jamming, in case she needed it again later.

"Uh huh. When it's stapling." Which was the dude being a wiseacre to impress the student.

Yeah. That's exactly what would make a teacher kind of not-happy on a Friday afternoon.

2 comments:

  1. Not that anyone in my building is like this, but I've heard rumors that there is a teacher in a particular building who--when someone says, "Good morning" to them, they respond not one iota. This same teacher, when in a scoring (writing assessments) session, kept talking and socializing...and when a teacher left the whole group to go to another part of the library so they could score the papers, the Chatty Cathy came over to that teacher and started talking to herself. This same teacher took over a workshop that another teacher was conducting, proving she's not only unfriendly and rude, she is also a know-it-all.

    At least that's how the rumor goes...

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  2. Sioux,
    Well. At least there was no copier involved. Or rightful seats taken at a lunch table or library meeting. So we here at the OH SO WRONGED Faculty Grievance Adjudication Center are moving this case to the bottom of our investigation list.

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