Tuesday, I Was The Windshield

Not that anything fantastic happened, or that I wreaked havoc on society...but on Tuesday, I was the windshield. Not the bug.

The BUG was the bug!

Don't worry, no bug was harmed in the making of the events that led to this story. I might not even have been moving at the time. Or T-Hoe, that is. I was sitting on my ample rumpus in the comfy leather driver's seat of T-Hoe.

I'd just pulled into the garage, and put T-Hoe in park. I looked up, glancing through the window of the people-door, looking for my dog-greeters, and gasped to see a BUG on T-Hoe's windshield.

It was a pretty good size bug. I picked up my phone to take a picture, but even though I tapped the screen to focus a little circle on the bug...it looks like the camera focused on the background. Which is the front wall of the garage, in all its glory, with assorted unused indispensable objects hanging on nails.

There is Farmer H's jacket, which every couple of years gets encrusted with mud dauber nests. The fuse box that powers the lights in the garage and the non-running pump on the fake fish pond. A Scooby Doo mini tackle box that came with Toddler Genius's first fishing pole. Gripped handles of assorted golf clubs. The multi-colored plastic toboggan that Farmer H used to hook up to the 4-wheeler and pull the boys around the front field on a new snowfall. A lantern. A Styrofoam cooler. An insulated water bottle on a neck lanyard that we got at the local Labor Day Picnic about 12 years ago, and hasn't been used since. The handles of a push broom for water puddles from snow melting off T-Hoe, but more recently for nightly turds from our traitor cat Stockings before we locked him out of the garage. Boxes from the garage lights. Plastic bags of objects unknown. A folding stepstool/ladder that my mom gave us one Christmas. Oh, yeah, and my fat fingers that got in the way, and look like they're going to crush that bug.

I don't know what kind of bug that was, but it did NOT take kindly to a Nexus being held over it trying to focus for a picture. That thing skedaddled up the windshield and onto the top of T-Hoe. No way was I going to stand on the running board and look for it. What if, when I popped my head up over the roof, that bug was staring right at me???

I let it go. Somewhere, on T-Hoe or in the garage, is a big brown bug that looks like it would give a satisfying crunch if stepped on with a shoe sole harder than a Croc. I hope it was too big to crawl through the weather-stripping around T-Hoe's doors...