"HO HO HO!" said Even Steven, eight days after Christmas.
Remember when I was worried about my checks being shipped a week before the order form clearly stated they would arrive? Uh huh. My last line of that tale was: "Why do I have a feeling this won't end well?"
Well, the reason I had a feeling this wouldn't end well is because obviously, it was NOT going to end well!
After writing about my concerns, still unable to find confirmation of the new delivery date I'd entered a credit card to pay for... I'd been checking my tracking number. Which STILL said I didn't have any orders. Which was stupid, because it also showed my delivery date of January 3, by 8:00 p.m.
Lucky for me, I found a way to hold my delivery! Uh huh. It only took about 45 minutes and everything but a DNA sample to register with FedEx for such a service. SWEET GUMMI MARY! That form asked for my WEIGHT on my driver's license! And gave a list of four people, and told me to select the one associated with me. Which were NONE of them! But it didn't give me that choice. So I had to cancel the whole thing. But I started over, to try again. And this time was asked my driver's license HEIGHT, and how many acres we own, and to pick the city where Genius lives. Seriously! I'm pretty sure this is just a ruse to harvest information and turn it over to the feds.
Anyhoo... I made it through the registration this time, and put a VACATION HOLD on all my package deliveries through FedEx. Yep. No packages to be delivered until after January 4th. I even got a confirmation email from FedEx on December 30th.
Dear Hillbilly Mom,
We have updated your FedEx Delivery Manager profile as requested. We have changed the following section:
Vacation Hold section
If you have not requested these changes, please call Customer Service at:
Okay, that's not their actual phone number. But it might as well be. I didn't know that then, though. I was pretty pleased with myself that I'd finally outsmarted FedEx, and made sure my package wouldn't be arriving on the day we took The Pony halfway back to college.
I'm pretty sure you know what happened, right?
You can check your own prophetic powers tomorrow, when I reveal the outcome.