We went to the casino on Thursday, with Farmer H behind the wheel of A-Cad. Riding with Farmer H is always an adventure. His sweaving was tolerable this time. Only a few strays into the wake-up bumps on the highway, only a few drifts into the other lane.
My main issue this trip was FREEZING. It was an overcast day, 46 degrees when we left the Mansion. Temps would be climbing into the 70s, but I know the casino is always cold, so I wore a sweatshirt over my regular gambling uniform pink plaid shirt. The temp on both dual controls in A-Cad were set at 74. This would probably be fine, IF there was any air blowing that heat around.
I tried to hold my tongue, for The Pony's sake, who doesn't like listening to our squabbles. You'd think a simple request for heat would be met with the blower being turned on. Problem solved. But no. Not when the driver is Farmer H, Auto Miser.
We traveled the county blacktop highway for about 30 miles. Got our McDonald's breakfast at the drive-thru, and got on the interstate highway. After Farmer H had consumed his Sausage, Egg, and Cheese McMuffin, I dared mention that I was cold. Farmer H reached over and set my control to 80 degrees.
"That might work, if any air was flowing. It's not."
Farmer H put his hand up to my center vent. "It's blowing."
I put my hand up to my side vent. Nothing. I turned the dial. Nothing.
"That vent is closed. No wonder you're not getting anything."
"I just closed it. Trying to see if it had been closed, and I could open it."
"It's on."
"No. It's NOT on. I could turn my side up to 100, and I still wouldn't get any warm air. Because you always put it on AUTO, and say it works automatically. That's all you ever talk about! AUTO, AUTO, AUTO! If the fan isn't on, the air doesn't move!"
Farmer H reached over and tried to set my contol on 100. The highest it went was 90. He left it there, and held his hand to my center vent again. There was no change. Farmer H cranked the dial on the fan, to put it on the highest setting. Warm air started blowing out the vent. I turned my control back down to 80.
"You don't have to crank it up so much. My point is that you never want to turn on the fan. You think AUTO is actually doing something, but it's not!"
Farmer H turned it down to medium. "You're a big girl. You can operate the heat."
Yeah, right. In the past, this results with a heavy sigh, or vocal objection from Farmer H. About AUTO! AUTO will keep the temperature at what it's set for! Miraculously! Without any air moving at all!
Anyhoo... at least I was finally warm. But then we entered a brief shower. Light rain. Farmer H finally turned on the windshield wipers. On the lowest setting. So I endured a watery windshield with a distorted view, then a swipe that smeared dust. I didn't even bother to give my opinion of THAT situation. Nor when we got back home, and I saw how deflated A-Cad's tires were.
I don't know what the deal is with Farmer H. He acts like it costs money to turn on the fan to blow the heat, and to run the windshield wipers faster, and to put air in the tires so they're at the proper inflation! AND like such an imagined charge would come out of HIS pocket!
6 comments:
Wipers on the lowest setting is just plain ridiculous, more so for a driver who is already near blind or actually blind in one eye. (in Australia he would be denied a licence). I agree about the air blower too, it needs to be ON to have any effect.
I'm also wondering if I should buy a pink plaid shirt to wear when I buy my draw tickets, for the luck factor.
River,
I think his vision only keeps him from getting a commercial license. I do know that a condition of his regular driver's license is that he has a left side mirror. Since all cars come with them, it seems to be an unnecessary requirement. I suppose if he was driving with a mirror broken off, he might get a fine.
I guess Farmer H has misinterpreted the powers of the great AUTO!
River 2,
It's my favorite shirt! I've had it for many years, and was wearing it for my $8,600 jackpot! Can't hurt. Pink is a nice color. This one has thin dark red lines making the plaid pattern.
The Man is the opposite. He turns the fan on full blast, even before the engine heats up. First, I freeze, then I feel like I am suffocating. I was thinking that The Man might lose one of his eyes if he ever told me I was a big girl and could operate my own heat!! I would show him just how a big girl would react!
Kathy,
Sometimes Farmer H will turn on my seat heater before I get in. But NOT the blower. Ever! Unless nagged into compliance. He only has one (working) eye, so he knows I wouldn't harm them. I'm storing that incident as ammunition for a future "disagreement."
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