Deaf, Inattentive, Dementia

Perhaps you've heard of the hip happenin' parlour game of the 2000s: F/Marry/Kill. If not, you're not missing anything. I have created my own version, pertaining to Farmer H: Deaf/Inattentive/Dementia. It's the easiest way to explain his reactions.

Saturday evening, I told Farmer H that he must slice the FREE ham he'd won at bingo. I put a lot of time into the side dishes for Easter Dinner, and the least he could do is cut up that FREE ham. I put out everything Farmer H needed for the task. A big platter, the ham, the butcher knife, and a large container to put the slices in. Then all I had to do about that ham was to take out slices to warm on.

I made sure Farmer H washed his hands. And told him how to slice.

"It's already a spiral ham. So just set it on its end, and cut down. Then we'll have a bunch of slices for ham steaks, and sandwiches. Around the bone, I'll use chunks to cook some beans. And the bone. Here. I'm giving you this large ziploc bag for the bone. See? It's right here next to the paper towels."

Farmer H nodded that he saw the large bag, and knew what was expected. I moved on to getting other stuff ready for the next day. 

Farmer H was quite congenial, sitting on a stool at the cutting block, carving a large hunk of meat. He was in his element. As I expected, Farmer H would put two slices of ham into the container, then eat a piece for his trouble. Not a big deal. We had plenty of ham. Farmer H also volunteered to cut up the bone-area chunks into smaller pieces, so they'd be ready to go into a pot of beans later.

When he was finished, Farmer H picked up the platter to take out on the porch for the dogs. The sinewy sections that he had put aside.

"I'm giving Jack the bone. I'm sure Pupsie will take it away, but maybe he can run off with it."

I only had half an ear on Farmer H's voice. But then I looked up from the sink as he was walking to the kitchen door.

"Wait a minute! Why do you have that bone? That's for the pot of beans later!"

"Oh. Well. I was just going to give it to Jack."

"What do you mean? We already had this conversation! I put out that big bag for the bone. I told you I'd find room in the freezer for it! It's for beans, not for the dogs! Don't you remember saying you saw the bag I put there for it?"

"Oh. Yeah. I forgot."

Don't worry about the dogs. They had plenty of snacks from that ham. Neither of them needed that delicious ham bone with bits of meat and fat.

Here's the thing. Did Farmer H just not hear me? He seemed to understand. He looked at the big baggie I put on the cutting block, and nodded. Was he just pretending, because he didn't hear me, and didn't want to ask me to repeat it? Or had he forgotten the purpose of that bone, in the 15 minutes since I informed him?

I'm thinking the problem is inattention. Farmer H tunes me out. He asks about other things when he doesn't hear me. And he can remember quite boring details of his SUS2.5 transactions to tell me about when he gets home. 

I think this was a case of Farmer H not really caring what I was saying when he was slicing that FREE ham. Thank the Gummi Mary, I was able to rescue that bone!