Progress, Humbug!

Mrs. HM does not like new things. She gets used to something, and is comfortable with it lasting for eternity. Why did videotapes give way to DVDs, and then DVDs change to the Blu-Ray version, and then movies disappear into thin air to be conjured up on demand? Like 5.25 floppy disks giving way to 3.5 floppy disks, and then CDs, and then flash drives, and now some mysterious cloud! Some might call Mrs. HM a stick-in-the-mud, but she is more like a Giant Sequoia mired in a peat bog.

Last week, I read that the stoplight near The Devil's Playground is going to be converted to a ROUNDABOUT!!! Please say it isn't so! We already have two roundabouts. They are not in a busy area. THIS intersection has lots of traffic that comes off the interstate in the afternoon. And school bus traffic. It's a 2-minute light. I don't mind the wait so much. It's organized.

The local online newspaper said the roundabout will make this intersection SAFER! It's been there all my life, and I've never seen an accident. So that's a dirty dirty lie! I am really not looking forward to the shut-down of this intersection during construction. It will force way more traffic onto my other road to Sis-Town. The Universe gets me coming and going.

ALSO, when I was in Country Mart on Friday, I saw a sign on their deli counter that said BIG CHANGES COMING JUNE 2. I asked the workers what it meant, and they said they didn't know. Only that the deli would be closing on June 2, for remodeling. They didn't know what was going to be put in, only that the entire kitchen and bakery were being torn out. They didn't even know if they would still have a job!

The world is moving on, and leaving Mrs. HM behind!

Slow Blog Day

Nothing happening here in Hillmomba. We didn't grill or do anything special for the Memorial Day holiday. Poor Pony. I'm sure he would have come out for steaks, but we just didn't think about it. You know, what with every day being kind of the same when you're retired. We can have Pony come out another day off. There's still plenty of summer left. In fact, it hasn't even officially started yet, though the temperature is supposed to be near 90 on Tuesday.

Farmer H has done nothing about getting POOLIO ready. He usually starts that around May 1, taking off the cover, testing the water, adding chemicals, and waiting for the sun to heat up the water. I guess I'll ask him if he's done POOLIOing. Last year it seems like he only got in about a dozen times.

Still no oil change for T-Hoe, though Farmer H did put in some more oil, so the alarm doesn't sound. I think T-Hoe is down to 10 percent oil life left. That can't be good. He's already old, and now his arteries will clog!

I don't know what Farmer H has planned for this week. He needs to deal with T-Hoe, and POOLIO, and work on the flip house. He'll probably just fritter his time away fiddling with stuff in his old storage locker.

As for me, I'll be doing pretty much nothing. Besides cooking and dishwashing and shopping and toilet-cleaning and bill-paying. Maybe winning a $100 on a scratcher. Which I did last night, on a $10 ticket.

Hearing Me Now!

It's HEEEEERE! Farmer H got his new phone on Saturday afternoon. He said the phone store wasn't very busy. Only a man and woman as the other customers. I guess they have no life, either, being there on the Saturday of Memorial Day weekend!

Anyhoo... Farmer H went in. He saw The Gen Z Kid who had waited on him the other four days he'd been in there trying to buy a phone. GZK saw Farmer H, but didn't acknowledge him. Another employee, a Tail-End Millennial the age of Genius, waited on Farmer H.

"That kid who ordered my phone didn't do NOTHIN'! He sat on a counter and played with his phone. He saw me, and he knew I was there to pick up my phone, but wouldn't wait on me. Another one, about Genius's age, got my phone, and transferred my information. It took about an hour. He seemed to know what he was doing."

"Of course that other one didn't want to deal with you! He already had his commission! Why would he want to spend an hour actually assisting you with your purchase, when he could pawn that off on another worker?"

"Yeah. I'm sure that was it."

Anyhoo... Farmer H has a phone like mine, only a little newer. Same model, but I think his is 5G, and mine is 4G. Besides being cracked all to Not-Heaven. I helped him get his Casey's Rewards app, which is the only item that didn't transfer. 

I think Farmer H will need to ask The Pony to help him get the time and date in big numbers on his main screen. I don't know how. Or maybe he can ask HOSS (Farmer H's Oldest Son's Son), who is in middle school, and will be helping Farmer H move some merchandise out of his old Storage Unit Store on Monday.

Something Is Not Quite Right In The Center Of Senior

Friday was the "holiday" meal at the Senior Center, for Memorial Day on Monday, when they'll be closed. Farmer H knew ahead of time that they were serving pork steaks. He sent me a picture of his tray. Not when he sat down to eat. That would have made too much sense. He sent it around 7:00, while he was at the auction.

Maybe Farmer H's lunch crew was too busy actually serving the meals on this day, and didn't join him at the table to fawn over him. Otherwise I'm not sure he would be taking a picture of his food. He would be busy basking in their adoration, preening, lording it over the regulars who live in the hotel over the dining room.

I hope Farmer H has not angered them! Perhaps he's been absent too many days this week, working on Pony House. Because it does not look to me like his tray was prepared with the usual level of loving care!

There it is. Pork Steak, Slaw, Baked Beans, Deviled Egg, and Cake. Farmer H said that my deviled eggs are better! He didn't make much comment on the rest of the meal. I think that cake looks tasty. Like a Jello cake, where the red stuff has seeped in.

Here's the deal. Something about that tray triggers me! First of all, that dark blue is not a very appetizing color to eat food from. Secondly, I think the compartments are upside down! Every school lunch tray I ever had put the main course on the bottom right. And the upper left had the compartment where you set your drink, which was not round at all, but a square carton of milk. So this tray has issues.

Also, what's going on with that silverware compartment? Did Farmer H have a mini tray, or did he get a gigantic knife?

I need to ask Farmer H if this is the standard tray. And have him ask his benefactors of the occasional extra helpings WHY the trays are so unusual. Maybe they got a good deal on them.

Nope. He Can't. Hear Me Now, That Is.

Poor Farmer H. His quest for a phone is more ill-fated than the 3-hour tour of Gilligan and Skipper's passengers! This is Saturday. It will be Farmer H's 5th trip to the phone store over in Bill-Paying Town. When he ordered the phone on Wednesday, they said it would be in on Friday. Here is where the story diverges...

Friday morning, I got an email at 6:47 a.m.

GET READY-YOUR ORDER'S ON THE WAY!

Sounded good to me. I assumed Farmer H would also get such a message. I knew he was at his SUS2 (Storage Unit Store 2) until noon. Then he would probably go get his phone before heading to his rendezvous with his cronies for their Friday afternoon bull-shooting session.

When I got a text at 8:01 a.m. saying "Your T-Mobile order has shipped!" I figured it was on its way to the store. Since the email link for tracking had said it was being readied for delivery at 6:47 a.m.

I hadn't heard anything else by the time I was getting ready for town at 1:30, so I checked the tracking again. VOILA! The phone had been delivered at 1:05. An inside delivery, with the name of the person who signed for it. I was sure Farmer H would be checking, and was probably over there getting his new phone set up. I didn't try to call or text him, because that would be awkward while his info was being moved from the old phone to the new.

Well. Farmer H got home around 5:00. I asked if he had his new phone.

"No. It wasn't there. I was there at 1:00. The guy told me it could get there any time. So I sat on the parking lot for a while, but no UPS truck showed up. So I left. But now here it is, 5:02, and I get a text that my phone has been delivered."

"WHAT? It was delivered at 1:05. I checked the tracking."

"Well, maybe I was there at ten till one. But I didn't see any delivery."

"You must not have waited long. I can't believe they didn't call you to let you know it was there. They need to do SOMETHING to earn that commission!"

"Well. I didn't hear nothin' till this text just now. I guess I'll go tomorrow when I'm done selling."

"They'll be busy on a Saturday. Be prepared to wait a while. Make sure they get it set up. That's their job!"

"I'm supposed to meet one of my buddies at the lockers at 4:30."

"You better tell him to leave if you're not there within 15 minutes. Because if they're moving your contacts, you won't have a way to call him."

"Yeah. I'll tell him."

We'll see if the 5th day is the charm... 

Maybe He Can Hear Me Now

Farmer H is supposed to get his NEW PHONE today. After all he's been through trying to buy it, I hope he is finally rewarded with a bill and the actual phone. This will be his 4th trip to the phone store this week! Monday the line was too long with the workers not working. Tuesday he was told he wasn't on the account, so he couldn't buy a phone. Wednesday they would allow him to buy it, but suddenly didn't have it in stock like they had told him on Tuesday.

"He said they DID have one in the store. It was on the floor. A floor model. I didn't want that. So they ordered it to be delivered to the store. They're getting it with the screen protector already installed. So hopefully it will be better than when they do it in the store."

That's the thing. Farmer H MUST have a screen protector, and a wrap-around shock-absorber thingy, and a holster. Not just because he wants them, but because he is rough on phones. And each new one is always a different size, so he needs a new holster. It all adds up to another 1/4 the cost of the phone!

Anyhoo... let's hope that they get his information transferred over to the new phone without issue. 

"The guy told me I could do that myself at home! Nope. I'm paying them for the phone. That's their job! Why else would I order it there in the store for them to get a commission? I could just order it online. It's their JOB to transfer my information if I go in their store and buy a phone!"

Are you as apprehensive as I am about this process going smoothly?

As Much As I Hate To Admit It, Farmer H Might Be Right About Jack's Increasing Girth

As I came down the driveway Tuesday after my trip to town, I saw a giant rabbit on the left, sitting in the grass between the driveway and Copper Jack's acreage. It's an overgrown thicket on the other side of that fence. Makes for good neighbors. That bunny flaunted its cotton tail at me as he hopped away. He was a big fellow or fellowette.

As I continued toward the garage, a flurry of activity caught my attention from the right. An even huger rabbit darted across in front of T-Hoe, closely followed by long-legged Copper Jack, and my ground-hugging little Jack. I had to put on the brakes. They were oblivious to the unwritten rules of Animal vs Two-Ton Vehicle.

All three critters darted under the fence and disappeared into the underbrush. I surmised that this hunt was unsuccessful when my little Jack joined me in the garage. No sign of carnage. I'm sure that greeting me would not be Jack's top priority if he had a tasty rabbit carcass at his disposal.

Chasing is good exercise. But the catch is detrimental to Jack's waistline.