Sunday, December 14, 2014

I Am Josephine's Anger: A Drama In Real Life

WooHoo! We almost saw some fisticuffs this afternoon on the parking lot of The Devil's Playground! Here's how it went down.

The Pony and I got a late start due to the delivery of our new Frig. So the after-church crowd was there. The parking lot was full up to the last five or six spaces in each row. We found a decent slot off to the side of the grocery end, and had no issues ourselves. It was on the way out that the drama reared it's ugly fists.

We went cruising in T-Hoe down the main drag. That's because it's a shortcut to get to Burger King across the road for The Pony's late lunch. Mrs. Hillbilly Mom, of course, stops at all crosswalks and stop signs. It was at the second one that the issue occurred.

A green car driven by a blond lady was coming at us from the other direction. She turned in front of me. She had time. But she stopped. STOPPED! Right in the roadway. Blocking me.

"Oh. I see what she's doing. She's waiting for that car to back out." Indeed. It was a slot second from the end. Near the pharmacy entrance. So she waited. Backed up, even, to give that leaving car room to get out. But she still blocked. Me. As long as I could see her intentions, I was fine. But then...just as she started to pull forward and take that space, A MAN IN A BLACK SPORTS CAR PULLED THROUGH FROM THE OTHER SIDE!

Uh huh. That's dirty pool. He could see she was headed for that spot. That she had been waiting. And his spot was perfectly good. Mere feet farther away than the new one. So the green car blond lady backed up again. Motioned for Black Car Guy to come on through. Because isn't that what one would think? That a person that close was probably just on the way out, without backing up. Because he had a perfectly good spot. But no.

Black car guy refused to pull on through. He motioned his hands at Green Car Blond. I don't know what his signals meant. I think he was waving her on by. Like, "You'll never get this spot away from me, Girlie!" He was an older man. With tinted windows.

Green Car Blond flipped up her palms. Like, "WTF? Why are you doing this to me?"

Black Car Guy kept motioning.

Green Car Blond finally gave up. And got out of my way. I wasn't even motioning to her. As we went by that aisle, I saw her pull a U-turn and get into a spot three from the end, in the aisle across from Black Car Guy.

"Pony! We need to circle around! I want to see what happens. I bet that lady goes over to the black car and gives him a piece of her mind!"

"Nah. We don't need to do that. That's what we did the last time. It took twenty minutes."

"Yeah. But it was great. Until that policeman made the guy going the RIGHT way back up, and let the wrong-way guy go through. I want the good guy to win this time. Wait! What are you doing? Are you hiding back there?"

"No. I'm banging my head on the seat."

Apparently, The Pony is not concerned about a drama in real life.

3 comments:

Sioux Roslawski said...

The Pony fails to see the value of free parking lot entertainment--entertainment that hopefully involves hair-pulling, face scratching and nasty gestures and phrases.

For shame. Why haven't you taught him better?

Kathy's Klothesline said...

So, did you circle back around? Who won the fight? What is wrong with that child?? Has he no sense of adventure?

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
Oh, how I've tried! But The Pony is not only not all that interested in helping people...he just not all that interested in PEOPLE! Not even the juice stuff.

*****
Kathy,
No. I deferred to the back-seat rider. I'm sure at least a dirty look was forthcoming, and perhaps a fist-shake.