I'm not proud. It seems that puppy Pepper has more smarts than Mrs. HM.
Wednesday, I was coming home after our real estate closing on Bargain House. I had stopped by 10Box to pick up some big fat hot dogs that Farmer H wanted for grilling. Hot dogs, buns, waffle fries, bananas, baked beans, and some Drumsticks. Farmer H was in town moving furniture, so I had to carry the groceries in myself.
The hot dogs were in a 20-pack, the only way I could buy the big fat kind, unless I wanted to pay $15.99 for 12 all-beef, rather than the 20 of questionable ingredients for $10.99. This pack weighed five pounds. The ten bananas felt of equal weight. Anyhoo... I had several bags draped on my arm, plus my purse, and the metal water bottle clutched in my fingers by the loop in the plastic top.
You might not think that sounds like a lot of weight to carry, but my knees let me know. I set the bananas and hot dogs on the metal chair on the side porch. No need to climb the steps with that extra weight. I also set down my water bottle right in front of me, to get the bags off my arm.
Pepper was frolicking on the side porch. He's learned not to nip at the grocery bags. He's allowed a sniff, but no mouthing. I don't think he was ever trying to eat the groceries. They were just something new to chew on, which could have turned into a surprise treat. After several trips and admonishments of "PEPPER! NO!" he has learned to leave the groceries alone.
I have not taken my water bottle with me since we got Pepper. My trips are usually short. But the signing for the house was over in Bill-Paying Town, and I knew I'd be going in the store and getting scratchers later, so I took it. I only meant to set it down momentarily while juggling the grocery bags, then pick it up again to ascend the steps.
Pepper ran over and was right away interested in that water bottle.
"PEPPER! NO!"
He'd shy away, then come back. In all, I commanded Pepper five times! On the last one, he got his mouth on my water spout. Which earned him a swat on his hip/rumpus. He darted away, looking surprised. I picked up my water bottle, giving Pepper a lecture in the style of Farmer H, reminding myself to wash the spout when I got inside. I know my words did not enlighten Pepper at all, but the tone had him looking at me quizzically. I could see his little mind working.
Once inside, I put Farmer H's drumsticks in the mini freezer in the laundry room, and the waffle fries in FRIG II's freezer. Got the buns put away, and the beans and bananas. It was a hot day, and I was thirsty. Before putting my water bottle in FRIG II to cool off before I started my ticket-scratching session, I took a swig.
Immediately, I remembered that Pepper's butt-licking tongue had been on it!
YUCK!!!
I unscrewed the top and washed it, but it was too late to put that germy genie back in the bottle. I don't know if I'll catch some horrible disease, but by evening I was coming down with something. I suspect it's Farmer H's once-presumed pneumonia cold. Not a dog malady.
When I went out the next day, I taunted the frolicking Pepper with:
"You're getting your balls cut off next month!"
Pepper did not reply.


