Lack Of OTC Meds Makes Mrs. HM A Less Effective Detective

This morning on my way to put Shiba back on the charger in front of the living room window, I saw some suspicious activity in front of the Mansion. A white older-model SUV was creeping along the gravel road, headed up toward the section of properties on this dead-end road where the headless body was found in a septic tank several years ago.

Well! No one is going to dump a headless body (or even a bodyless head) out here again! Not on Mrs. Hillbilly Mom's watch! I went to the front door. Opened it halfway. And stood looking out. Watching. Nine times out of ten, that makes slow-driving cars gas it and scoot on up the road. Something about knowing that they're being watched makes whatever they're doing in front of the Mansion suddenly not all that necessary.

This older-model white SUV did not scoot on up the road. It continued, at a snail's pace, stopping every car length or so, then creeping forward some more. Very suspicious! I couldn't tell if it was in the middle of the road, or on my side, or on the crazy Rottweiler's owner side. Our property has a gradual rise, and we can't see the road surface that is about six inches lower than the edge of our field.

There appeared to be only a driver, wearing a white T-shirt. I didn't know if he might be casing our house for a future robbery, or looking for something dropped along the road. Still. Very suspicious. I had a mind to get my phone and take some video. I can do that, you know. Usually as a mistake when I think I'm taking a picture. Even a picture would be good. To show that older-model white SUV, with its back hatch open, held by some sort of wooden stick, creeping along our private gravel road. You never know when authorities might need to track down another body-dumper.

Yes, I thought about taking a picture. But my phone was way over on the table beside the La-Z-Boy. I'd have to walk back around the long couch and across the room to get it. Was that really worth possible incriminating footage of a possible body-dumper? Meh. My knees hurt. Because last night was my night to skip the ibuprofen that I take for inflammation. Suggested by my doctor nurse practitioner a year ago, to give my kidneys a rest. Three days on, one day off. He wanted two days on, one off, but that would make me almost unable to function for twice as many days a year!

Anyhoo...because I hadn't taken my ibuprofen the night before, my knees were extra achy, and I decided against walking over to get the phone and bringing it back to the door for a picture.

I DID walk back to the La-Z-Boy and plop down and crank back. I watched that older-model white SUV. It got to the end of the property (of both the neighbor and the Mansion) and started to back up. What in the not-heaven? Why not go on up the road and turn around? Unless the driver didn't know there were driveways there to turn around. Very suspicious, the backing up. For all I knew, that car might come up my driveway next! Thank the Gummi Mary it didn't!

I went on with my routine, took a shower, went to town for my 44 oz Diet Coke. Down by Mailbox Row, I saw a white car partially hidden by the underbrush. It was just across the low water bridge, parked on the short section of road that always washes out the pipe in a downpour, leading to gated property without a house. Either the hood or the hatch was open. Smoke was rising behind that vehicle. What in the not-heaven? VERY SUSPICIOUS! Were they burning evidence? I knew better than to drive over that way for a better look. You don't eff around with possible criminals in Hillmomba!

When I came back from town, that white car was still parked. But the fire was out.

Thank the Gummi Mary, today was Sunday, and I didn't have to get out and check the mail. I went on home. As I passed the driveway to the crazy Rotweiler's house, I looked to see if maybe they had an older-model white SUV. THEY DID! Or at least one was in the front yard (not driveway), with the hatch propped open with a wooden thingy. Then it started backing up! So I skedaddled on down my own driveway. I guess that older-model white SUV belonged there.

Or else the neighbors were being cased or robbed.