Wednesday, October 9, 2019

I Feel Like I'm Blindfolded, With One Arm Tied Behind My Back

Mrs. HM spent yesterday afternoon in a state of discombobulation. You know how it is, when your routine is upset, and you have to consciously consider every little action.

I dropped T-Hoe off at Mick the Mechanic's garage around 1:00. I'd cleaned out the bag of junk mail, and stowed my cup of magical elixir change inside the console. Moved a spare coat off the back seat floor, in case Mick needed to poke around under the seat that is not heating, checking for an electrical problem.

I didn't take my lesser bubba cup to town with me, so my throat was bereft of ice-water hydration. I kept my phone inside my purse, lest I forget it on the top of the console. Farmer H gave Mick the spare key, so I didn't have to worry about manipulating my key ring.

Of course SilverRedO has a rougher ride than T-Hoe. Mainly due to the driver, I presume. I might as well have put my magical elixir in a paint-shaker as in the cup holder. By the time we got to the top of Farmer H and Buddy's Badly Blacktopped Hill, the whole top of the lid was covered with at least 1 of the 44 ounces of Diet Coke that had sloshed through the tiny X. Let the record show that I never put a straw in it until I get home. That lid was as pristine as the day it came off the assembly line in the Lids For HM's 44 oz Diet Coke Foam Cups Factory.

Back home, I got my lunch ready, and then had to call for Farmer H to come down to my lair to electronically sign his application for new health insurance. He will be turning the big 6-5, and getting off my outrageously-priced policy in December! Anyhoo... my insurance rep through school had done the main part, and all we had to do was the signature. Plus fill in a couple vital boxes of info. Didn't take long at all. At 2:10, I hit the button to submit, and

THE SITE WAS HAVING TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES!

The Not-Heaven, you say! NOW what were we supposed to do? The site suggested trying again later. Okay. I could do that. I had all the info from Farmer H. But I was not happy with this development. Nothing EVER goes right for me! And here I was, all discombobulated from the lack of T-Hoe.

BUT, I think I know what was wrong with the site! While sitting for a minute with Farmer H, before carrying down my lunch, we were watching Gunsmoke on the TV LAND channel. His choice. A commercial came on around 1:50, about signing up for this same insurance service that Farmer H will be using.

THAT'S IT! All the old people who need to get their insurance set up were watching Gunsmoke, and saw the commercial, and when it was over, rushed to their computer to go to that website! By cracky, I'm a regular Columbo!

I waited until after 10:00 p.m. Hillmomba time, when all those east coast old people should be tucked into bed, visions of sugarlessplums dancing in their heads, and tried again. I got a message that said,

Welcome back!
Your application has already been successfully submitted and is under review.
If you have any questions or need assistance, please contact a licensed REDACTED sales agent.
That threw me for a loop. But I suppose all systems are GO now, and I don't need to do anything further. I sent an email to my insurance rep anyway, just in case. She's asked to be notified when Farmer H electronically signed, so she'd know it was done.
I hope I don't get any discombobulating news from her.

3 comments:

Sioux Roslawski said...

HM--I always encounter problems--technical problems.

There was NEVER any problems when things were done via a rotary phone, or a chalkboard. The floodgate opened and the problems flooded us after that new-fangled computer things reared their pesky heads.

River said...

You're right about the Gunsmoke-insurance ad timing. And don't worry about anything, once you submit it waits in the queue and gets processed as soon as the lines are clear. So do we call you HCM now? HillColumboMomba?

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
You ain't a-woofin'! I told Farmer H that I fear what will happen if the innernets go down. We'll be the only people with cash money! At least from what I see on my daily travels, with people taking five minutes to pay for a 94-cent Polar Pop with a debit card.

***
River,
I am confident that you are correct, since my insurance rep replied that she saw it had been electronically signed, and she'll keep an eye on it as it processes. She added that systems get overwhelmed this time of year, due to Open Enrollment.

You'd think someone could build a better money-trap...

Yes, I will answer to HCM. But I won't wear a rumpled raincoat or smoke a cigar or develop a wonky eye.