Farmer H Is So Mercurial That I'd Like To Send Him Into The First Orbit Around The Sun

Alas, I fear that Farmer H is having a post-mid-life crisis. And this, in turn, puts my idyllic retirement in crisis!

Let the record show that Farmer H was originally going to retire last December. We planned on it. I took the school health insurance upon my own retirement with that in mind. Because once I let it go, we could not get back on it. So I went and jumped through all the necessary hoops, and set up the proper funds, only to find that Farmer H decided he DID NOT WANT TO RETIRE YET! So he stayed on working, and we paid for insurance that we didn't really need as long as we were on HIS.

That's the crucial point, you see. My insurance runs from July 1 to the next July 1. And Farmer H's plan is set up for Jan 1 to Jan 1.

Now wrap your head around this. I just attended a retiree (ahh...doesn't that sound relaxing) meeting for insurance users at Newmentia last month. It's gone up several hundred dollars per month for our family plan. But what can you do? You have to have health insurance, and it has nothing to do with government regulations. Farmer H saw the handout I brought home, and declared that I should switch to a lesser plan. Because, he said, we actually HAVE insurance through his job, at minimal cost for the family. And because we don't need double insurance, I should switch mine to one with a higher deductible. One where you kind of pay as you go, from a special account. No thank you!

Our insurance rep at the meeting told us that SHE has that plan, since it's the best choice her company gives them. She is perpetually jealous of ours, though she doesn't say it in as many words. In presenting our options, she pointed out certain things that must be done on that plan, or you're SOL. Consider, if you will, the fact that it's not just Farmer H and I on this plan. We have one boy halfway across the state, ready to graduate in December, who will be on that plan at least 6 months, and another son in Oklahoma who will be on that plan for three more years, who may or may not have trouble finding his butt with both hands.

Can you imagine what a nightmare it would be, trying to coordinate the medical arrangements for the Hillbilly family, in all three geographical locations? Oh, no problem at all for Farmer H, because MRS. HILLBILLY MOM is the one these duties would fall upon. Nope. Not changing the plan. We already stepped it down one level from what I had when I was actively working.

NOW...flash forward to today. With a blustery wind, a little bit of rain, and Farmer H spending a portion of his last day off this week in his La-Z-Boy. Giving me a glimpse into the upcoming winter months, when he will be inside the Mansion with me 4 days out of 7 each week!

And do you know what he had the nerve to say this evening, after I'd prepared him his special SHRIMP TACOS again?

"I think I'm just going to work until the end of August, and call it quits. I'm not even going to apply for social security next year. I'll just use my 401K money, so I won't really have an income."

WHAAAAAAT?

This month, I have to take some checks over to the Newmentia main office, to cover my monthly insurance premium for the next 12 months.

You can bet I'm not switching to a lesser plan.