Here We Go Again, With The Tickmonger Deigning To Take Responsibility

I made it to town for errand day, an abbreviated outing to baby my rumpus/leg nerve. The Pony rode along with me to the bank, and pumped my gas after I paid, so that I didn't have to rush back across the parking lot before the pump shut off. I took my cane, and felt better than I expected. 

During this outing, I kept feeling an itch on my left side. It was about midway down my ribs, a little past the midline, towards my back. It was in a convenient spot for my thumb to reach and scratch. Watching TV later that night, while Farmer H was downstairs in my Old People Chair, watching a different show, I pulled up my shirt and sweatshirt to get a good scratch, nail to skin. I couldn't see that area, but I felt something. Something I didn't want to feel. Something flippy.

It was a tick. I got a grip on it, with my thumbnail and finger. Ripped it out of my flesh, and smashed it, then mummified its remains in a Puffs With Lotion. 

Dang Farmer H! When he came upstairs to watch the next show with me, I informed him of my attack by a parasite he has once again brought into the Mansion.

"I don't know why you always blame ME. You get 'em from the dogs. That's where I get 'em. It's not my fault."

"Seriously? I walk from the house to the porch to the garage. I never step on grass. I've only been to town a few days this week. I only pet Jack, for about a minute when I leave, and a minute when I come home. I don't hold him. Just a hand on his head and chest. But YOU are out on that mower for hours. You walk around the pool messing with the filter. You walk around the trailer, loading the mower for town, where you MOW MORE GRASS! You go out in the yard to pick up Pupsie's trash. But I'M the one bringing it ticks???

I probably got it from the bed. That's the side I lie on. My left side. You don't even take a shower at night anymore. Your shoes sit right there in front of the recliner. You brought me my phone from my jacket one day when you had just come in. And you carried my jacket to the kitchen for me another day. My jacket never goes outside anywhere around the dogs. AND you said you've had several ticks this summer."

"You're full of it. It's not MY fault. I just got one off my leg yesterday."

Farmer H was doing nothing to prove his innocence! His statements could be used to prove MY case! In fact, in the wee hours before he woke up the next morning, I found ANOTHER tick! It was on my left arm, inner elbow. I could see this one, and dispatched of it the same way. They were both small, maybe half the size of a pinhead. Both on my left side.

Clearly, these parasites were introduced to the inner Mansion by Farmer H. They either went from the sheets to my jacket when I laid down for my nap, or from Farmer H to my jacket when he touched it, twice. I don't think the ticks migrated across the carpet and climbed the couch. I think they were on my jacket, and finally worked their way to my flesh. 

That river in Egypt is Farmer H's favorite body of water... There's nothing to be done about it after the fact, but Farmer H could at least take responsibility for bringing the ticks into the Mansion.