Monday, April 14, 2014

Why Can't We Just Trade Chickens And Goats?

I wish I had something scathingly brilliant to report tonight, but alas, I do not.

I have been updating the FAFSA. I do not find pleasure in updating the FAFSA. There's all that signing in and remembering passwords and PINS and figuring out what is the bare minimum that needs doing. I would happily have gone on with my life tonight, ignorant of the FAFSA needs, except that FAFSA sent me an email. Uh huh. Wanting me to update the status from "will file" a tax return to "filed" a tax return.

Hey! FAFSA! Have you heard? People have until April 15th to file a tax return. So why you wanna do me like this, FAFSA? Jumping the gun, putting the cart before the horse, counting the chickens before they hatch...let's take a deep breath here and allow the proper interval before chomping at the bit over this impending deadline.

It's not like my kid is going to qualify for any aid. Seriously. We're the pay people. So why do we need the FAFSA? Oh. Another link in the chain of financial information the government collects on law-abiding citizens. Pardon me. My conspiracy slip is showing. I blush.

Last year, it was like planning a Seinfeld baby-viewing expedition. Instead of, "You've got to see the BABY!" all we heard was, "You've got to file the FAFSA!"

In other news...The Pony will be getting a free ride to the Missouri Scholars Academy this summer. Three weeks on Newmentia's dime. If, by dime, we mean $500. Newmentia is picking up the tab for his fee. HooRah, Newmentia! Schoolin' my Pony! What a lovely way to say that you're thinkin' of me.

Enough is enough. I'm off to the counting house to count out my money. I might even take a break to partake of some bread and honey. One thing's for certain. You won't catch me in the courtyard hanging out the clothes.


Sioux said...

Okay...Some Paul Anka. Some Barbra Steisand and Donna Summer. Did I miss anything? (I didn't miss the bit of Seinfeld. Hopefully the FAFSA was less breathtaking than THE BABY.)

Hillbilly Mom said...

I think you're caught up. The FAFSA was, indeed, less breathtaking than the BABY.