Maybe You CAN Crap A Bullcrapper

Farmer H came home with four tomatoes on Tuesday.

"There's some fresh tomatoes on the counter. Old Buddy gave 'em to me, out of his garden."

"Oh, good. I love fresh tomatoes."

When I saw them on the kitchen counter, I wasn't so sure they were actually "fresh" tomatoes. Granted, there were two large, a medium, and a small. Only one was a bit oddly shaped, with a pointy little pixie-hair bottom. The part where the stems came off were nice and round, not irregular. The outer skin was all the same color, except for a tiny bit of yellowish hue on the smallest tomato. Nice, smooth skin. No blemishes. No dirt or dust.

I didn't want a tomato that night, but Farmer H said he'd have a couple slices. I didn't want to waste a tomato. I cut the smallest one, four slices, and then the bottom cap, and the stem-top cap. I planned to take a taste of the top and bottom. But Farmer H PUT ALL SIX PIECES ON HIS PLATE!!!

"Oh. Well. I was going to try it. But never mind now."

"Well, you said you didn't want to waste any."

"YOU said you only wanted two slices!"

"Here. You can have some."

"No. You already have it on your plate, with salt."

Anyhoo... I can't be sure, because I didn't taste that tomato. But when I sliced it, the inside was firm. It was not dripping any juice. It sliced just like a storebought tomato. AND it was cold!

"Why are these tomatoes cold, if they came out of Old Buddy's garden?"

"I don't know. They was in the truck. I had the air conditioner going."

Huh. They should not have been cold, just from the AC. We'd had rain all day, with temps in the 70s. These tomatoes felt like they'd come out of a refrigerator. I was expecting Farmer H to say he had put them in the fridge at the Beauty Shop while they were working. He didn't say WHEN Old Buddy gave him the tomatoes. If it was on the way home when he dropped him off, I would almost swear that these were store tomatoes out of Old Buddy's refrigerator. 

I suppose I my suspicions will be confirmed or denied when I actually try a taste at supper.