Saturday, August 6, 2016

A New Side Business To Occupy Farmer H's Retirement Years

Most days, the universe conspires against Mrs. Hillbilly Mom. But occasionally, she gets by with a little  help from her blog buddies. Sioux was kind enough to offer up her husband as a business partner for Farmer H! She's so selfless, our Sioux. Retiring, then still working at a regular job molding the future citizens (okay, the mind is the first to go, that came out furnture citizenks) of our nation.

I foresee Farmer H and Sioux's Mister parlaying their dish-dirtying acumen into a business that should be named: N. CAHOOTS. "Two Old Coots to Jog Your Memory (As Long as No Jogging is Involved)." We may have to work on that moniker. It could mean trouble for a business card. Small print is not the friend of the clientele they are courting.

Yes, Two Old Coots could provide a sentimental bridge to yesteryear for old biddies whose children have flown the coop, or widderwomen who miss their own old coots. Leaving dirty dishes throughout the house, perhaps in plain sight, perhaps not. Throwing soiled clothing on the floor. Leaving the toilet seat up. Tracking mud through the house. Eating treats meant for someone else. Turning the TV up really loud. Holding out various items they are tired of, just because they can't find a wastebasket and don't want to hold it themselves. Piling trash like a Jenga champion above the rim of the wastebasket.

I can't even begin to list the services Two Old Coots could offer.

We'll start booking them soon. Just dial NCAHOOT (rhymes with nincompoop). Reserve your Two Old Coots early, before the rush, as college season kicks into gear.


3 comments:

Sioux said...

I will even offer my old coot, free of charge, on an extended-time basis, to new customers. Or even to old customers. Or to unsuspecting customers.

To take advantage of this deal, the customer must commit to at least a week of providing room and board for my old coot... with overnights a must.

I'm sure Kathy and her Kamp would love to have a second old coot around...

fishducky said...

My son & my son-in-law once talked about starting a business called TSG, Inc. That stood for Two Stupid Guys. The name would also work if my other son decided to join them!!

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
THat's even better! UNSUSPECTING customers! We'll advertise it as a revenge service as well!

***
fishducky,
Heh, heh. I'm sure they would be great at whatever it is they do. Like, perhaps...burning off the yard (for healthier undergrowth of new grass) around a cedar house. Farmer H did that for the Mansion one year. You should have seen the cats waiting around the perimeter for mice to run out. And me standing on the porch in case the Mansion went up in flames.