Monday, October 10, 2011

Good Thing He's A Pony, Not A Cat

Perhaps I've mentioned my thirteen-year-old son, The Pony. I think his name has come up once or twice. I may or may not have voiced a concern over the hairy kneecaps of The Pony. Of which he is very proud. But that's an ancillary topic today.

Every afternoon, we let our new puppy out of her pen. She was dumped at my mom's house, who refused to feed her for two days, then we took her in. She's a tiny imp, just now gaining energy enough to frolic, and we keep her in a rabbit hutch overnight and while we're gone, because she's smaller than a rabbit, and hawks cast their shadows over her when she's out. Which really makes the chickens squawk.

The Pony sat down on an old cooler, and I stood beside the porch. We roughhoused with Juno until her pointy teeth became too punctury, then calmed her down for petting. The Pony's knees and shins were at my eye level. "Did she bite your leg? Is that blood?"

"Where? Oh, that? That's ketchup."

"It looks like ketchup. Did you get some on you while eating your Sonic tater tots on the way home?"

"No. I didn't have ketchup with them. That's left there from lunch."

"You went through half the day, and two hours of Academic Team practice, with ketchup on your leg? And you didn't know it?"

"Nope."

"I'll hand you some Germ-X out of my purse."

"That's OK. I'll get it." He let a dribble of spit fall on his shin. He began rubbing it over the ketchup, like a Mom kind of spitbath, without the Mom spit. The hair swirled like that of a dog getting a suds bath. A lather appeared. The hair was thicker than Juno's.

"Heh, heh. I didn't know it would make suds!"

The Pony. He never ceases to amaze me.

6 comments:

labbie1 said...

Wow! The Pony really has some interesting spit. Have you had him tested? Perhaps you can patent the sudsing spit.

Chickadee said...

Ewwwwwwwww. Tell the Pony to drink more water. Mebbe then the gross suds will disappear. But then he's a boy and boys are gross ;)

Hillbilly Mom said...

labbie,
Yeah. We'll license his spit, and I can bottle it and sell it to moms, so they can squirt it on their young 'uns and scrub. Without the young 'uns wigging out over mom spit. Little will they know that the key ingredient is kid spit. OR that could be the selling point.

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Chick,
Gross AND proud of it! That's my boy! He's the one, when much younger, who complained to his grandma that he hated it when I clipped his fingernails. Of course she took his side. "Why, honey? Does it hurt? Does she clip them too close?"

"No. It's really hard to pick my nose without my fingernails."

Mommy Needs a Xanax said...

Boys are gross. I love 'em.

Kathy's Klothesline said...

My kids called spit on a tissue "mommy wash".

Hillbilly Mom said...

MommyNeeds,
Gross and proud. Also, stupid and proud. As in, "I just bent over to tie my shoe, and hit my head on the cutting block. Ha ha! Is there a knot?"

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Kathy,
Well, if we could bottle it, it would be all the rage.