Thursday, November 15, 2018

Drug-Seeking With Mrs. HM

I almost said that to my doctor nurse practitioner on Monday, you know. While waiting in the exam room for him to enter, I knew he would say, "What brings you here today?" So I figured I could say, "Oh, I'm just a drug-seeker." Because, you know, I was only there for a routine 6-month visit, to get refills on my prescriptions for another 6 months.

I decided against it, though. You never know how a medical professional might take that. They might think it was a cry for help, or that I really was a drug-seeker. I'm sure he's heard it before. It's probably like how an airline pilot stewardess might not react favorably to somebody jumping up and yelling, "HI, JACK!"

Anyhoo...I called in my prescription refills this morning around 10:00. Sometimes they'll have them ready by the time I go to town. I get notified by text. But the automated man on the refill line kept repeating that my prescriptions had expired, and it would take an extra day to contact the doctor. Well. It does not. But you can't program an automated line to recognize that the medical office has sent refills over the innernets, I guess. That could be subject to drug-seeking hackers. In the old days, with a paper scrip, I'd drop it off and they'd put that refill notice in my file until mine ran out, then they'd check, and didn't have to contact the office.

Anyhoo...I figured the meds wouldn't be ready today. They're for my missing thyroid and my blood pressure. Nothing to sneeze at, but I always have a few pills left when I start the refill process. Unlike Farmer H, who goes the very day he runs out, or sometimes even a day after, saying, "One day isn't gonna hurt me." With 4-8 inches of snow in the Wednesday evening forecast, I didn't even think I'd be able to pick up those meds until Friday or Saturday. No big deal. I had enough to get me through.

Well. I'd come home from town, and had just consumed a big cup of vegetable beef soup (the canned version), several ounces of Diet Coke, and a bubba cup of ice water, when my phone buzzed to tell me that my prescriptions were ready. Okay. I could run back to town to pick them up. Before the snowstorm. I ascended from my lair, put my town clothes back on, took a potty break for all those fluids, and checked the cabinet for cough drops.

Farmer H had told me, upon my return (the first time Wednesday) from town, that I should have gotten myself some Mucinex, for my cough. I don't really like Mucinex, so I asked him if we still had cough drops. He said we did. THAT'S WHY I CHECKED BEFORE LEAVING HOME! Of course I found two bags of "throat soothers" that look like cough drops, but don't affect the cough, which I had bought for Genius quite some time ago. Oh, and there was a bag of cough drops, cherry flavor, that actually suppress a cough. Uh huh. There was a BAG of cough drops. No cough drops. Just the BAG. Empty.

Anyhoo...while picking up my prescriptions, I also got two bags of actual cough drops. A sugar-free version, dark purple in color, in case Farmer H needs them. And a bag of Honey Lemon, which I prefer. I think I'm set for a blizzard. We'll see what develops.

5 comments:

River said...

Lucky you, I've never known any cough drops to suppress a cough, all they do is soothe the throat, so coughing doesn't hurt so much. We can get cough suppressant syrup, which I used when my toddlers had colds from socialising at playgroup, but gave it to them only at night times, to help them sleep. Once the toddler years were gone, I never had reason to buy it again.
I also go to the doctor only for prescription refills, but here at my local pharmacy, I can't get them a week early, she reminds me I should still have enough for the next few days and if I want to take a new pack home I can, but then I won't get the $1 discount. I think they worry about people stockpiling and then taking too much at once or selling them to drug makers. Which is fair enough and my pharmacy is only five minutes walk away from my home.

Anonymous said...

You sound like you have plenty of drugs--I mean medications--to get you through the snowstorm!!

Hillbilly Mom said...

River,
Sometimes those cough drops stop the trickle of snot down the back of my throat that trigger a cough. Sorry to be so graphic! Mainly, the mentholyptus ingredient thins the mucous, and I can cough up stuff better, or get my head less stuffy.

I used to have THE BEST liquid cough medicine, called "histinex" that my old doctor would call in for me. I think it had codeine. Worked like a charm. Nowadays, you can't get any good medicine, due to the real drug-seekers and the ban on opioid-like substances.

I can get my prescriptions about 3 days before the time for a refill. Because I do this fairly often, due to weekends coming up, or trips to visit The Pony, I am several pills ahead. I don't like to think about running out! No discount for me, though.

***
fishducky,
Yes, my drug den is well-stocked!

River said...

Be as graphic as you like. I have that annoying post-nasal drip too, almost permanently during hayfever season, which for me is about 9 months long, I'm allergic to so much stuff out there. Choking on that when lying down makes falling asleep not-so-easy, so I dry it up by taking two antihistamines an hour before I go to bed.
With a name like "histinex" I suspect that cough medicine may have contained an antihistamine because back then a lot of GPs knew that a cough might likely be allergy based rather than infection.
Being so far from your pharmacy, you have good reason to get your pills ahead of time.

Hillbilly Mom said...

River,
I really miss that histinex! It took away the cough tickle, unlike other codeine based prescription cough medicine.