You'll be reading the full story elsewhere, but let's just start it here with a teaser, and move on to the rest of Mrs. HM's Very Bad Day. Which didn't really kick into high gear until Farmer H was in the Mansion.
I cut my finger with a ceramic knife that he gave me!
But the unkindest cut of all was the fact that I had to use a 10-year-old bandaid to staunch the flow of my life fluid!
Do you know how hard it is to carry out your daily and nightly duties with such an awkward life-fluid-loss-inhibitor on your finger? I had to hold that finger out awkwardly while putting some Auction Sun Chips into a baggie to take down to my lair. Of course, halfway down the 13 steps, that baggie JUMPED off the tray, bumping itself down the remaining steps, to turn itself into crumbs on the tile.
An index finger has a surprising number of uses, which you may not appreciate on a day-to-day basis. The middle finger is a poor substitute for most of them. Like typing. Or pulling pants up and down. Perhaps excavating a bat from the cave. Picking up pizza slices. Getting a box of bandaids open.
As if a throbbing finger and crushed Auction Sun Chips and hard-to-hold pizza were not enough of a challenge... my original rolly chair decided to go all wonky and keep rolling away from my desk as I sat motionless, then act like a brake had been set when I tried to roll forward again!
Makes me wonder it that man I played Boy Scout for, with his bloody cart-injured finger, was Even Steven providing some foreshadowing.
5 comments:
Fingers are painful because of all the nerves in them. After all, these are what we use to feel with. But some fingers are more useful than others and the index finger is the most useful …. not at all like HeWho's pinkie finger he nearly cut off. I even offered to use the pruning tool and just snap it completely off for him. I am quite practical, you know!
Nothing wrong with using a ten years old bandaid as long as it does the job, and Scooby Doo is fun to look at. I hate having nay fingers out of action, although I concede index fingers are the worst, closely followed by thumbs. You need to learn the trick of tucking your fingertips under when slicing anything.
Kathy,
According to my college chemistry student The Pony, knife slices are very had to stop bleeding, because the edges of the wound are so smooth that there are no rough parts where fibrins can form a framework to capture platelets and start clotting. I KNEW that, how blood clots in an injury, but I never thought of the smooth edges of a knife's cut.
***
River,
That's not actually how I cut myself. I've put the cart before the horse. The tale will be told elsewhere, but I will reveal here that I was actually scraping pizza cheese off the side of the knife with my thumbnail, and the finger was only bracing the other side of the blade against my thumbnail's pressure.
I think a thumb injury is worse. There's not three substitutes to fill in for a thumb's duties.
Scraping pizza chees off a knife should only e done with another knife or a fork so you can put that straight into your mouth. I hold the cut edges of a knife wound tightly together for a minute or so before I bandage it then try to squeeze it tight closed as I place the bandaid, then in a day or two all I need to do is trim off the dead edge of the cut with nail clippers if it hasn't sealed closed.
River,
You can start your own company called The Slice Squad! Like the Geek Squad, but instead of servicing computers, you'd show up to bandage a knife cut, and return to tidy up the skin when it heals.
Post a Comment