Sunday, September 22, 2013

Not Exactly Stained Glass, But It Catches The Light Just The Same

Each morning, Mrs. Hillbilly Mom is greeted with the beauty of nature.


No. Not the soffits and drainpipes. Not that wirey, twisty, metally blue orb starburst thingy my grandma gave me. The spiderweb! This is actually a small version. Most often, my eight-legged friends prefer to weave their tangled webs on a porch post to the right of this photo, facing at a right angle to this one. Must be something with the wind conditions lately. I am simply thankful that they do not drape their food-trawlers across my walkway.

Did you know that you're never more than three feet away from a spider? I imagine that's if you're outside, of course, and not in the middle of the ocean. And it might just be an average. But still. The world is crawling with spiders. Hope you didn't have an arachnophobia attack.

I don't really mind sharing Hillmomba with spiders. Unless they're ON me. Or drop out of the ceiling like Tom Cruise on an impossible mission, such as the one a couple of years ago in my midnight office, who broke her descent thread and plopped onto my Puffs With Aloe box, thus jettisoning her millions of babies to flow across my countertop desk space like water cascading over the top of a bathtub, with me swatting at them and silently screaming.

Shh...Do you feel four pairs of eyes watching you?

4 comments:

Sioux said...

We're almost finished reading "James and the Giant Peach" as a read-aloud. Miss Spider's poor grandmother was "painted" onto the ceiling by either Aunt Sponge or Aunt Spiker...but those two wicked women got what they deserved.

Bump.
Bump.

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
I'm sure it comes as a surprise that I am not all that familiar with this masterpiece. I have heard of it, and I have seen a few selected snippets of the movie. I vaguely remember those green tongue thingies, and seeing James standing in the yard looking at a big honkin' peach.

However...upon consulting my BFF Google, concerning the arachnid connection...I WAS SO DISTURBED BY THE IMAGE OF THAT SPIDER IN BLACK GO-GO BOOTS THAT I ONLY SLEPT FOUR HOURS.

You're a mean one, Mrs. Madam.

Sioux said...

There is only one movie that is better than the book. But I'm not going to tell you what it is, because it has given me an idea for a post...

The movie sucked. The book is marvelous...

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
You, Madam, are a tease of the bibliophile/cinephile variety.