Saturday, January 9, 2021

My Head Is Tied In A Knot

I have a stalker. His name is G. Mail. Every week, he sends me an email, saying that I am bloated. Full to bursting. That for my own good, he is going to stop feeding me messages. Until I regurgitate, he may just starve me. Ain't THAT a fine kettle of fish? How do you like THEM apples? Me? Not very much.

I'm pretty sure that back when G. Mail was just a gleam in grade-school Genius's cornflower-blue eyes, ol' greedy G. Mail professed that he had NO LIMITS. That anybody was welcome to join him to email to their heart's content, without ever having to worry about storage space. That was one of the luring points. Just have somebody invite you to join G. Mail, and you were set for life.

I'm pretty sure G. Mail shares a branch on the family tree with those rental car companies who know how to TAKE a reservation, but don't know how to KEEP a reservation. And on his momma's side, he goes out on a limb with those mail-order companies who know how to TAKE and order, but not how to DELIVER an order. He's an Ind-- um... one of those givers who GIVES an item, but then TAKES IT BACK!

G. Mail says I have used 98 percent of my storage! Can you believe that? Why, all I use it for is sending an email every now and then, and receiving some from my ONE friend, or myself. Like maybe four or six pictures of pennies a week, for the past five years, and pictures of casino foods and slot machines, and let's not forget winning scratchers, and of course my special Jack and Sweet, Sweet Juno. How else could I get them off my phone and onto my blogs? I don't know HOW it's possible that my space is full!!!

Tonight I went through some old emails. Cut out about a thousand, give or take a couple hundred. I went from over 9000 to the low 8000s. And do you know what? That only reduced my hoggage from 98 percent to 96 percent! Of course, I didn't get to the penny years yet...

My brain is kind of fried. The Pony says getting rid of pictures should help. Help G. Mail to leave me alone, not help my fried brain. But that he doesn't think just deleting regular emails is that important, since he has over 20,000 unread emails on his account, and has never gotten such a notice. I think about 15,000 of them are probably from Farmer H, who says The Pony never responds to him...

9 comments:

River said...

How many???
I clear my email inbox every day except for confirmation emails of anything bought off ebay. I leave those until the item has arrived, then clear them out too. I don't understand why people keep thousands of old emails. If you want to keep all those old photos, have The Pony or Genius transfer them to a dvd for you.

Hillbilly Mom said...

River,
8,711 at this moment. I don't WANT to keep them. I just don't have time to delete everything the minute it comes in. Too many junk emails that keep evading the UNSUBSCRIBE command, especially right now after Christmas. I have saved my photos on New Delly, and the recent ones are backed up in that Google Photos thingy, according to The Pony.

I used to keep it under 1000, and thought I was doing good, but it has a way of creeping up on me unless I treat deletion as a full-time job. I can try to deal with 1000 a day, but that is a tedious process.

Sioux Roslawski said...

Perhaps River would like to hire herself out? I have 5,000-something in my personal gmail and 2,000-something in my work email (and I've just had that account since August). She could work for both of us, cleaning out emails and keeping our inbox nice and tidy...

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
Let's not be hasty, Madam, in disposing of my 20-year-old emails! I wouldn't want a new task to take away from River's efforts in her Riverpedia information service. I find it much more valuable than having a non-bloated G. Mail account.

River said...

You two need to dedicate an hour a day, or even half an hour, to clear what has come in that day, then clear another equal amount of old stuff. Keep at it and it should bring the bag to half full at least. Don't forget to also clear the spam file and the "deleted" file.

River said...

PS, unsubscribe usually requires you to click on the link and confirm that you do in fact wish to unsubscribe. Well, mine do, and are then unsubscribed, never to be seen again.

Hillbilly Mom said...

River,
I need to mechanical-pencil that into my schedule! I could easily do it while I'm listening to my conspiracy videos. I DID remember to go in and EMPTY the trash after I deleted the first thousand. Supposedly my SPAM file deletes anything over 30 days old. I'll look into that also.

I did unsubscribe to four of them yesterday. Two of them "took," two of them didn't. So I'll try again, even thought they popped up the message "You've been unsubscribed." I recall it taking several times last year, and it worked until around September, when they started bombarding me again. I'm waiting on a couple of them, as I still have 3 Christmas gifts undelivered!

River said...

Anything that bombards you after you've tried unsubscribing, mark it as spam, then instantly delete it from your spam folder. After several spam deletions they should stop with the bombarding. Well, it works for me.

Hillbilly Mom said...

River,
Another good tip! I hope you put that on your Riverpedia site!