Mrs. Hillbilly Mom Is SOOOO Stupid

I've been walking every day for quite a while now. At least six months, maybe more. Lately, my knees have been hurting, and sometimes an ankle. Or two. Over the last few days, I've noticed at night, when I settle back in my OPC (Old People Chair) that I have a swollen ankle. Last night, it was the right ankle. All puffy on the inner side. A couple days ago, it was the left ankle, which had been hurting as I walked one morning.

I'm not really worried about this new development. The ankles don't hurt all that bad. I DO spend time sitting in front of New Delly in my dark basement lair, and I've been taking off my socks and Crocs, what with my red great toe that is now almost normal color. It wouldn't surprise me that the swelling in my grindy knees settles in my ankles, and I notice it, now that my socks aren't holding everything in and covering up the swelling so that I don't notice it. No big deal. In the mornings before walking, the ankles are fine.

Anyhoo...it's been steamy hot again, even in the mornings. I try to get my walk done by 9:00 a.m. Today when I came in, I stood in the kitchen cooling off before my shower (don't want a George Costanza incident, where the shower doesn't take) by putting together some carrots/onions/potatoes for roasting, for several suppers this week. Then I showered and went to town.

When I came back, I put away the cooked veggies and washed the dishes. Then gathered my lunch and drinks to head downstairs. Of course I changed from town clothes to my regular Mansion clothes. I'm not one to wear a duster like my mom, which most people might call a housecoat or housedress. I just put on my dark blue sweatpants with the white stripe down the leg, and my big purple-and-white pin-striped shirt with buttons down the front, and my black Doc Ortho socks, and red Crocs. Don't be hatin' on my fashion!

As I stepped into my Crocs, I noticed that my left Croc fit more snugly than usual. Usual being loose, so loose that I have to be careful not to throw a shoe as I go down the 13 steps to the basement. I always hear my mom's advice as I start down those stairs. In my head, people! Not her literal voice! I remember her advice, which she always gave, at least a couple of times a week. "Honey, you be careful going down those stairs when you're home by yourself." I was thinking that as I went down, holding onto the stair pole thingies until I got too far down, noticing that my left shoe was in no danger of coming loose today.

"Huh. I guess that after my walk, and all that standing in the kitchen, the swelling in my knee is sinking into my ankle. My ankle doesn't hurt. And that knee doesn't hurt much, either. But I'm sure that's all it is."

You don't want tight Crocs, people! Even when you wear socks with them (sorry, don't be hatin', is alls I gotta say).

I got down the 13 steps, and into my office, and got ready to take off my Crocs under the desk and let my tootsies breathe. I looked down, and saw that the hem of my sweatpants was tucked up inside my left Croc. I pulled it loose, and that Croc as as roomy as normal.

I'm so stupid.