Tuesday, September 1, 2015

We Might As Well Call It A Museum, Actually, And Charge Admission To Get In

On the agenda for the Semi-Weekly Meeting of the Newmentia Lunch Time Think Tank today was the subject of trophy cases. Not so much trophy cases, as what trophies should be encased in them.

One Think Tanker revealed that a patron had donated a large...um...mascot to Newmentia. Let the record show that the mascot shall not be revealed, but we can imagine it to be a pink pig. Yeah. That's the ticket. The mascot of Newmentia High is the pugnacious Pink Pig! Don't mess with the hog or you get the tusks!

Anyhoo...this patron donated a heavy ceramic Pink Pig, with the comment, "Y'all can put this on the bottom shelf of your trophy case." To which the Think Tanker in charge of filling the trophy case replied, "If we do that, there won't be any room for trophies that we've won through hard work." Dagnabbed if you do, dagnabbed if you don't, I guess. You can please part of the Pink Pigs all of the time, and all of the Pink Pigs part of the time, but you can't please all of the Pink Pigs all of the time.

Think Tanker 2 wondered why we have a suit worn by local singing legend Herlin' Fusky in its own case in our cafeteria. Her husband had asked that question just last week. "Did he go to school here?" asked Think Tanker 3, meaning ol' Herlin', not Think Tanker 2's husband.

"NO!" the rest of us chorused. "He went to a school way out west that we absorbed, and he went to another school that's a rival. But he never went here. He did, however, bequeath his memorabilia to us."

Think Tanker One related a tale of visiting a museum devoted to all things country music, and seeing a picture of ol' Herlin' on the wall, and stating, "Huh. We have that suit in our high school cafeteria. To which one of the curators practically called him a liar, until Think Tanker One took out his phone and proved it. At which point the curator fellow nearly had a conniption, saying, "But we could display all that stuff here!" And Think Tanker One told him, "You could, but you can't. Because WE have it in our high school cafeteria."

Think Tanker 4 chuckled and added, "Now I know what to say in my graduate classes on the first night, when we all have to tell something unique about ourselves. I can say that I have Herlin' Fusky stuff at my school."

"NO!" Shouted Think Tanker HM. "You say, 'I eat lunch with Herlin' Fusky's suit every day.' That'll get 'em. You better take a picture right now."

Let the record show that the Newmentia Lunch Time Think Tank is not above dropping names to impress their newfound friends and enemies.

2 comments:

Sioux said...

Herlin' Fusky? Is that his real name, or some clever (but this time confusing--at least for me) play on his name?

I'm quite proud of being in the same 7th grade social studies class as Colin Firth, I went to high school with Al Nipper (not thrilled with that one, due to his personality) and am working in the district that produced Kathleen Madigan. I can probably claim some other brushes with near-greatness, but am unaware of any others...

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
Switch the two first letters, and you'll have his name. Which makes about as much sense as Herlin' Fusky. He had a hit song about a town in our area back in the 1960s.

I worked with people who worked with Kathleen Madigan! I think that puts me one degree closer to her fame than you.

St. Louis Cardinal FOOTBALL quarterback Jim Hart came to my (Mom's) house and knocked on the door and I talked to him! When he was the starting quarterback! He was looking for an upholstery business across the road from us. Guess the city didn't have upholstery prices like my home town.