Wednesday, October 28, 2015

Are There No Public Toilets In The Afterlife?

This morning I finished making the lunches, took my medicine, and headed for the shower. Wait. What was that? A noise. From the end of the Mansion by The Pony's bedroom. It sounded like water running. It WAS! I stepped out of the kitchen, past the ice-making grunts of Frig II, and heard it more clearly.

The water was running in the boys' bathroom, as if the toilet tank was filling.

I supposed The Pony had gotten up to use the bathroom while I was making lunches. Even though he never gets up that early. I went on to the shower at the other end of the Mansion. When I came out for my morning chair nap, I woke Farmer H.

"Did you get up to go to the bathroom while I was making lunches?"

"No."

"You didn't go in the boys' bathroom?"

"No. I don't think so. Why would I go in there?"

"Sometimes you do. If I'm in ours. Or if I'm about to get ready."

"No. I didn't get up. Why?"

"I heard the water running in their toilet. I guess it was The Pony."

I went to the La-Z-Boy. Farmer H got in the shower. As I was trying to nod off, I heard the water running again. In the toilet tank. I turned my head. The door was wide open at the dark end of the house. Nobody was in there. Ten minutes later, it happened again. Farmer H came out of our bedroom to leave for work.

"You might want to check that toilet. I think there's something wrong with it."

"Huh." Farmer H went in there. "I don't hear anything." He jiggled the handle. Then he got his whole-grain waffle out of the freezer and put it in the toaster. I heard him go out the laundry room door to feed the dogs. The minute he went out, that toilet started running again. As soon as I hear him come in, I hollered.

"It's doing it again! The toilet is running!"

"Huh. I guess it is. I hear it now." Farmer H suddenly seemed more enthusiastic about seeking a solution to the problem. He went in and turned on the light, removed the lid to the tank. I heard him rattle the change in his pocket and take out his multi-tool knife thingy. I heard some knifey sounds on metal. Then he came back out. "I don't know what it is, but I adjusted the float. I'll check it again tonight. It won't hurt anything."

Indeed. He didn't believe me until he heard it with his own faulty ears. Like I would be lying about something like that.

I don't know what's going on around this place.

2 comments:

Sioux said...

The lady of the house knows nuthin'--didn't you know that?

Our job is to cook sometimes, clean occasionally, and wear pearls at our throat.

Get with the program, baby!

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
Is it not enough that I buy a pack of hot dogs every six months or so?