Sunday, January 21, 2018

Memo From The Desk Of The CEO Of Epic Fails

You may remember that only a couple of days ago, I sang the praises of my new favorite treat, Great Value Raisin Bran.

I figure that a store brand cereal is pretty much the same as any other store brand cereal. Great Value is a product of The Devil's Playground. But I wasn't going there today. So I just knew that the Save A Lot brand, Kiggins Raisin Bran, would be equally delicious. After all, I used to buy cereal for Genius and The Pony there. They were fans of the Circus O's, a low-cost version of Froot Loops.


Many times, the store brand product is exactly the same as the brand name product. Even made in the same factory, but with different packaging and marketing. Or two different store brands might be the same. Not so with this raisin bran!


Isn't that the SADDEST BOWL OF RAISIN BRAN YOU EVER SAW?

Okay, the Truth in Blogging Law says that I must inform you that there were actually TWO raisins in my bowl of cereal, not one, as pictured. What can I say? I'm a greedy glutton, and ate that other one before snapping the photo. But truth is...there were only TWO raisins in that entire bowl! Too bad there's not a Truth in Cereal Box Pictures Law!

Let me just say that in my Great Value Raisin Bran, each and every bowl was teeming with raisins. From the first serving out of the box to the last. AND the flakes were thin and crunchy, whereas these in the Kiggins Raisin Bran were thicker and chewier. They had the consistency of recycled paper made as a science project by one of my 7th graders at Steelville Middle School back in the early '90s. Not that I tasted the paper or anything.

I feel so CHEATED! Even posing that last remaining raisin right there in the middle, and then saving it for the last bite, admiring it with each chew, did not make me feel like I enjoyed a healthy taste treat.

Also, I'm no expert on irony...but I DO think it was, perhaps, ironic, that a total stranger stopped me on the cracker aisle at Save A Lot, to ask if I knew where the little boxes of raisins were shelved! Had I only had the hindsight, at the time, to have the foresight to buy some of them, when I stumbled across them under the salsa jars, to make my Kiggins Raisin Bran more palatable.

This is one of the few times that a Save A Lot brand has let me down.

2 comments:

River said...

Check the small print on that box, you may find a line that says "return for full refund if not satisfied with this product"
or: find the website and email the company, let them know their product is a failure and you've told all your friends not to buy it.
I guess they decided the bran content was the most important.

Hillbilly Mom said...

River,
Good idea. Or I could let Farmer H feed it to the goat and mini pony, and go to The Devil's Playground for the good kind. I don't know if I can force myself to eat that dry fodder. That would be more like punishment than a treat!