Some cats are de-clawed.
Some dogs are de-barked. What I want to know is... can you safely remove
a dog's nose? Probably not. I think it's kind of vital to their
existence. How else would they sniff other dogs' butts?
My Sweet, Sweet Juno has continuous issues with her nose. Namely, the time she SHOVED IT IN MY MOUTH
WHILE I WAS TALKING TO HER! I wrote about it on my newer blog. I could
have severed her proboscis right then! Or The Pony might have sliced it off with a garage-door guillotine!
This
time, though, my thoughts of cutting out Juno's snout were not for her
future safety, but for mine. Perhaps not so much for my safety, as for my comfort.
Sunday,
I returned from a quick trip to town without my 44 oz Diet Coke. I was
saving it for later, after an excursion with Farmer H. So all I had to
carry inside were my purse and water cup. I tucked them on my right arm,
so my left was free for dog-petting and cat-kibble-dispensing. There I
was, one-handed, trying to pet jealous Juno, and happy Jack, while she
jostled him, trying to shoulder him out of my reach. I have reflexes
like a ninja, though. Just ask my former students from Newmentia. I was
able to give Jack his rightful petting.
In fact, I was leaning over to look him in the face when Juno jammed her rubbery wet nose against my left cheek, and
SNEEZED!
Sweet
Gummi Mary! That was quite an explosion, extra-pressurized by both
nostrils being flush against my cheek. Such a spray finally escaped that
it dripped down off my jawline. Juno seemed to think this was
completely acceptable.
I hurriedly doled out the
kibble, and scurried into the house. I DID take time to toss each dog a
slice of bread. Then I rushed around to the sink, and washed my face
with cold well water and Blue Coconut Snowball hand soap from Bath and
Body Works.
My mutts need Miss Manners.
6 comments:
Oh yuk!!! I'm so glad I don't have a dog. Not that I don't like them, I do, but dog sneezes are as bad as dog slobber and I'd just as soon do without thankyouverymuch. I find it bad enough that Lola rubs her cheeks against everything hard surfaced, like the corners of my laptop screen.
River,
It wasn't as bad as the time I bit down on her nose, but close! I can't believe so much snot came out of a dog. The only thing that bothers me about our two remaining cats is when one rubs its head on me when I'm petting it. I don't like them getting their eye juice on me.
It isn't actually eye juice, it's a secretion from scent glands that tells them you are a friend once they have marked you. I'm not sure why they also mark objects unless it's to smell their way around in the dark. Perhaps Lola is just scratching her face or easing a bit of sinus pressure. The vet tells me she has hayfever.
River,
I didn't know that! I bet Lola is doing a combination of marking, scratching, and easing pressure. Some from instinct, some to help her hay fever.
I guess eye juice is better than pee when marking territory.
Kathy,
Hmm...I might call them equal evils if it's a dog, but for a cat, YES, eye juice is definitely better than pee!
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