Farmer H Couldn't Find His Rumpus With Both Hands, A Magnifying Glass, And GPS

We allowed 60 minutes to drive north and meet Genius for lunch on Wednesday. The ride usually takes 45 minutes, but we left early, just in case. There's some highway construction along the way. 

Well. Good thing for the 15 minute cushion! I went out to A-Cad, and questioned Farmer H about my seat position as I was getting in.

"Has my seat been moved?"

"Yeah. Old Buddy was in here with me. But he moved it all the way back."

I pushed the lever, and the seat slid back four inches.

"I don't think so! It just moved back!"

I got in. Adjusted the seat back so I wasn't lying down waiting to be launched into space. I got my purse on my lap, with my cell phone in an outside pocket to receive texts concerning Genius's approach. I reached down to have my seatbelt extender ready, for when we got onto the blacktop road. The seatbelt will fit without the six-inch extender, but without much play. One little reach for something, and it locks tighter. No use buckling up on the gravel, even with the extender, as all the lurching will lock that seatbelt tighter and tighter.

"Hey! Where's my extender?"

"Right there. It was on there when you got in."

"No. It's not clicked in. It's not here."

"I just put it there! It was on the seat!"

"No. I looked at the seat when I was figuring out it was not in the right position. And it's a different color. Gray, not tan like the seats."

"Maybe you sat on it."

"I don't feel anything. And I didn't see it."

Farmer H reached over. I lifted my butt off the seat, leaning over on the other cheek of my rumpus, for him to feel around. Nope. Nothing there. I searched the console. The crack down beside the seat. Farmer H reached down on my floor side. I looked in the glove compartment. Nothing.

"I guess we can pull over down by the mailboxes, and you can get out and look for it."

"It has to be here. Old Buddy left it hooked to the regular seatbelt. It was banging on the side of the car when I drove. So I took it off, and put it back on the latch part. Check over on the hanging thing of the seatbelt."

"It's not there."

Farmer H pulled over on an offshoot gravel road, before we got to Mailbox Row. He got out. Rummaged around on the back floor. 

"Nope. It's not back here."

"Well, I'm looking down in the crack, and I see something red. Like on the buckle end of it."

Farmer H rummaged some more.

"No. It's not here."

"Well, the red part disappeared. So you must have moved it."

Farmer H rummaged again. "Oh. Here it is."

Of course Farmer H swore that it was on the seat, and I hit it with my butt getting in, and knocked it between the seats. Saying that he had clicked it into the latch thingy, but it must not have caught. So the whole episode was MY fault! Let the record show that Mrs. HM is mighty observant before she plants her ample rumpus anywhere. And that extender was NOT on the seat.

SWEET GUMMI MARY! I don't know how one man can be so blind. Even with one eye! He still has one left, you know!

We arrived at the restaurant one hour after we left the Mansion. As we were waiting to be seated, I spied Genius and Friend parking out front, and walking in. Little did they know, we were almost late.