For The Sweet

Farmer H set about making breakfast this morning. A double-yolked egg fresh out of one of his hens last night, and some bacon that expires in two days. "But Hillbilly Mom," you might ask, "how is one egg enough for all of you Hillbillies to have for breakfast?" Oh, my dear friends. Try to keep up. We are talking about Farmer H! The man is an island. He did, however, ask The Pony if he wanted an egg. You know. Because apparently, today is Pony's Day.

Happy Mother's Day to me.

My boys came through with four little spiral notebooks that I love, love, love. And some tasty candy that I will no doubt love, as well. Not that I need it, of course.

The #1 son was in for a bit of ribbing when I saw that his card declared me to be a Maxi Mom. And one of his notebooks had the word KIND on the front, the other sporting SASQUATCH on the back. Even more jarring, considering that The Pony's card was festooned with butterflies, one notebook proclaimed GREAT, and the other exhibited DREAMSICLE on the rear cover.

"What's this? You think I am already MAXI, a SASQUATCH, yet you foist candy upon me? And clearly, you are commanding me to be KIND, because all you ever tell me is how cold my heart is.! And look what my little Pony gave me. He thinks of me in terms of BUTTERFLIES, DREAMSICLES, and GREATness! What a sweet child he is!"

#1 took it well. He didn't even let it slip that The Pony had picked out all the swag, and designated which half would come from #1. In effect, The Pony set himself up to come out smelling like a rose. He says he didn't even notice which gift was which, though.

They all bought me a wonderful strawberry cake. And Farmer H kicked in with a card and a Whitman Sampler. Sweets for the sweet, you know.

I must now bid you adieu so I can watch the season finale of Survivor, while DVRing the season finale of Celebrity Apprentice. I will provide more pearls of wisdom tomorrow. If I am not in a hyperglycemic coma.