Friday, May 20, 2016

Eat More Cake Or Buy More Underwear

Mrs. Hillbilly Mom has a problem. She needs to eat more cake.

Not really. But she was wishing she had eaten more cake in the middle of The Devil's Playground this afternoon. Or at least some Pizza Hut buffet.

The Pony and I took off to run some errands around 11:00. We can shop any day we want now, you know. And we didn't shop last Sunday because of The Pony's graduation. I had promised The Pony that I would take him to the Pizza Hut lunch buffet. That boy loves him some pasta and breadsticks and cinnasticks. Cheese pizza, too.

Since the buffet didn't start until 11:30, we first drove over to Newmentia's administration building (yeah, I can't seem to retire) to pick up my fake check. Direct deposit is a good deal, but I want that stub for my records, and with the mail ne'er-do-wells around here, I didn't want it sent postal. Then we went to the bank to deposit some of The Pony's graduation riches. After that, we hit the Hut. Since I'd just had my little sausage biscuits a couple hours previous, I opted to order a Personal Pan to take home, as well as one for Farmer H, while The Pony strapped on the feedbag at the buffet.

Once in The Devil's Playground, my noontime fast (and not enough cake over the long term) came back to haunt me. Mrs. Hillbilly Mom has been cutting back, you know. Making wiser choices. Since the beginning of February, she has dropped two pants sizes. Which is not to say that anyone would notice. Mrs. HM still has plenty-ample hippage that would satisfy Rubens if he was looking for a full-figured model. However...her latest pants are now starting to droop.

The problem with walking all around The Devil's Playground with drooping pants is that these pants also like to grab Mrs. HM's granny-panties and drag them down too! Oh, dear. If Mrs. HM had been wearing a skirt that drooped like that, her granny-panties would have hit the tile.

Such a conundrum. To eat more pizza and cake to hold up your pants, and thus avoid underwear slippage...or to continue making wise choices and buy smaller underwear.

I think I'll stick with the wise choices.


Kathy's Klothesline said...

Buy some clothes that fit, lest you end up on "the people of Walmart" site!!

Hillbilly Mom said...

Yeah. The less you see of Mrs. Hillbilly Mom, the better!