Friday, January 27, 2017

Listen To That Voice In Your Head, HM

This morning I set off to transfer money for the boys' spring tuition from their credit union accounts into checking, and go into our financial advisor's office next door to make Farmer H an appointment for Monday to discuss his 401K, and mail the boys' weekly letters and a BILL, and harvest the upcoming week's foodstuffs from The Devil's playground. I figured it would take about 2.5 hours. That's the average for such errands.

I informed Farmer H of my goings and comings. He kind of expects that from me, though is not forthcoming on such details for his own travels. He was working in the basement workshop. Don't even get me started on that.

On the way to town at 10:00, I called my sister the ex-mayor's wife. She had called me at the tail-end of December, wanting to know if I planned to come get my gift calendar that I left at her house Christmas Eve. And even though I tried to a couple days later, texting her before I went to town, she texted back that SHE was in OKLAHOMA! So we missed that opportunity for her to unload it, and me to get my forsaken gift.

Anyhoo...I called her this morning. She probably thought something was wrong, because we usually just text. She answered on the third ring. Yes, this WAS a good time for me to pick up my calendar. I told her I really couldn't stay, that I had several errands. She said she could bring it out to the driveway. You know. So my T-Hoe didn't have too long to leave dust and mud on her pavement.

Sis came out and stood by my window, shielding her eyes from the 10:15 sun. The wind was freezing cold. I told her to sit in the car a minute, and after the third invitation, she did. Hope she didn't get dirty! We chatted a while and made tentative plans for a gambling weekend in the future, after we bolster our play money resources.

Just as Sis was getting ready to go back inside, my phone buzzed with a text. "Let me check this, in case it's one of the boys." And it WAS. The Pony informed me that he had just received an email that he was getting another $2750 in scholarship funds on the 6th. That's good to know, since I was going to take his payment money out today in order for the check to clear my bank (remember how they always hold EVERYTHING, even a cashier's check, unless Farmer H pitches a fit?) So...I went ahead with the #1 Son's tuition, but held off until the 6th for The Pony's. His is not due until the 20th anyway.

"Well. That's good news! More scholarship money for The Pony. Good thing we talked so long, or I would have already taken the money out. Now it can wait."

"Still. That's GOOD news! He has more money!"

"Yes! It IS good news!"

"I'd buy a lottery ticket if I was you!"

"I told you, I've been in a slump. My odds are way off. I'm like a normal person now. I can't seem to win. It all started when #1 won that $100. Ever since then, I can't get a winner, or it's just the amount of the ticket. Over the last three weeks, I should have had five winners, and I've only had ONE! After yesterday, I said I wasn't going to buy any for a while."

"Yeah. But that's awful good news. I'd get one."

"Well. I might."

In the midst of running my errands, I called Farmer H to tell him about the newfound scholarship money. And how Sis had told me I should buy a lottery ticket. "You should!" That was Farmer H's advice. Even though he never wins.

So...on my way to The Devil's Playground, I stopped by the finally-open convenience store to use their bathroom. They have REALLY nice bathrooms. And since I think it's rude not to buy something when you use the facilities, I bought a ticket.

After dealing with The Devil, I headed for the gas station chicken store for my 44 oz Diet Coke. There, I also bought one ticket.

By the time I got home, it was already 1:30. Farmer H had made himself hot dogs for lunch, but I'd had neither breakfast nor lunch yet. So I put the groceries away and made a plate of The Devil's chicken. Then I hobbled down to my dark basement lair to feast and swill and scratch my two tickets.

They were both losers.

There's only so much good luck in the world, I think. And lately #1 and The Pony have cornered the market. I should know better than to take advice from Sis and Farmer H.


Sioux said...

I think considering how The Pony's car accident played out, you might have a long dry spell when it comes to lottery tickets. THAT moment used up a lot of your luck (in my opinion).

Besides, some of US recently bought a few lottery tickets for a holiday get-together, it was their first time buying lottery tickets, and no one won anything. They say you always remember your first time... this first time is not going down as a happy memory, that's for sure.

Kathy's Klothesline said...

Your good luck has just covered the boys for now ....... And, really, you listened to your husband???

fishducky said...

Like Yogi Berra said, "You're not in a slump; you just haven't been hitting lately!!"

Hillbilly Mom said...

Ain't THAT the truth! I actually thought of The Pony's miraculous survival as I was typing the part about the boys cornering the luck market.

Now I know how you LOSERS feel when your ticket does not pay off! Oh, how the mighty have fallen!

I would much rather my boys reap the benefits of my luck. I'm selfless like that, you know. I have no idea what got into me when I TOOK FARMER H's ADVICE!

Yeah. I just have to take it with a grin of salt!