Thursday, January 17, 2013

Can't Complain Today

Today was a middling success.

The drivers running stop signs (heh, heh, I first typed 'stop sighns') and the dude who made the U-turn right in front of me, and the broken glass from a previous middle-of-the-road faux pas did not impede my trip to school this morning.

The fact that Learn 360 was down was discovered by moi in time to grab an alternate educational sciency video to fill ten minutes at the end of the lesson.

Nobody required corralling nor pugilistic separation during my lunch duty.

The kid who got out of his seat and squeezed by a girl writing with a pencil, snagged himself in the side with the eraser, then cried, "Stabbing! That's assault! I'm going to report you!" was reprimanded for his antics with the following logic from the mouth of Mrs. Hillbilly Mom:

"Five minutes ago you complained that you were being tickled by your work partner. Now you've been stabbed. If you had stayed in your seat, or taken another route, your so-called stabbing would not be an issue. I am sure that many people in this room might have dreamed of stabbing you with a pencil (a chorus of "YEAH!" arose spontaneously), but I doubt that any would be foolish enough to do it in my presence, in broad ceiling light. Between your tickling and your stabbing, you have two strikes. The third one will remove you from your partner, and bring you back to your seat. You know. The one directly in front of ME."

"Okay. Got it."

See how easy it is to reason with ninth-graders?

Here's hoping Friday goes as smoothly. I've got a three-day weekend on tap, you know.


Sioux said...

I have a friend (I'm not talking about myself) who had a student (not one of our students) who snuck into the nurse's office after a trip to the bathroom. He came back with a thick layer of vaseline on his lips. Claiming the nurse said his lips were "bad," he made it seem like the nurse was a dry-lips-seeking-missile and had snagged him from the hall. That was not the case. He had gone into her office without the nurse's pass and without a handwritten note from his teacher (not me).

His teacher thanked him afterwards, and since they were going out for an extra recess period at the end of the day, and since his lips were so "bad," told him he probably needed to stay in, because the cold wind would make his lips even worse.

His teacher is so thoughtful like that...

Hillbilly Mom said...

The Pony gave himself a pair of bad lips in third grade. They puffed up like a hot dog bun under his nose, and took on the color of a baboon's butt. When I tried to determine the etiology of his ailment, The Pony declared that his lips were dry, and they got even dryer when he was out on the playground at 20 degrees, so he kept licking them to make them better.

It took a whole week to get him back to normal. Well. You know what I mean.