Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Hey! Student! Leave That Teach Alone!


We don’t need no over-priced junk
We don’t need no bills to pay
No solicitors in the classroom
Students leave that teach alone
Hey! Students! Leave that teach alone!
All in all it’s just another drip after school
All in all you’re just another drip after school

Yeah. Teachers do not need any items on that fundraiser list that you beat feet down the hall to shove under their nose. After school time is sacred. Nobody wants you dashing in, all fresh-faced and hopeful, eager to defray the cost of your club fees, your special T-shirt, your trip to see Phantom of the Opera for forty dollars.

Imagine, if you will, a teacher who has reached the final bell, supervised the hall, dashed to the bathroom, and finally settled down, shoes off, to steal a few moments of solitude. Do you think that teacher wants to fork over hard-earned cash that won’t be paid until the fifth of the month, AFTER Labor Day, AFTER working for four solid weeks for free*…to support your extracurricular activities? Just in case you are immune to sarcasm, NO, WE DO NOT.

Why can’t kids earn money for this stuff the old-fashioned way? By asking their parents.

Let the record show that Mrs. Hillbilly Mom is now the proud owner of a dozen Krispy Kreme donuts to be delivered August 29, and a mini LED clip-on light that will arrive in September. All for the low, low price of $18.00.

Like crime, teaching doesn’t pay.

*Mrs. Hillbilly Mom is quite adept at managing her money, thank you very much, and has stashed away her stack of summer checks to be doled out in timely installments, so TECHNICALLY, she is not working for free like the poor pitiful new hires who must find a place to live, purchase a wardrobe, scrounge gas money to get to work, and scavenge for sustenance if their school cafeteria won’t run a tab. But she understands, having been a brand-new teacher herself many, many years ago.

3 comments:

Sioux Roslawski said...

Perhaps you can use thought control to repel the students, so they don't approach you with their wares...

Oh, you don't need no thought control?

Melissa said...

We just started a fundraiser, and I had a teacher's child ask if I would buy a tub of cookie dough. I said sorry, I can't afford it.
I have to save my money for our ever changing dress code this year. It started with no flip flops, so I couldn't wear my nice arch support Crocs. Now I can't wear my Clarks because they do not have a strap on the back. I guess I'll have to dig out my old, ratty tennis shoes or my winter boots.

Hillbilly Mom said...

Sioux,
You are correct, Madam!

****
Melissa,
It's like that time many years ago, when I taught at a different school, which had just outlawed denim for teachers. So one guy stood up at the faculty meeting and said, "You mean Wanda over there can't wear her $60 denim dress, but I can wear my $8 Walmart polyester slacks?" Yes. That was correct.