Monday, March 13, 2017

Karma Takes A Big Bite

Funny how Karma has a way of biting you in the butt. "Nom-nom!" says Karma, picking her teeth with a matchbook cover. And by biting YOU in the butt, I mean the collective you, not actually you, or me, even. Okay. Who I really mean by YOU is my sister the ex-mayor's wife.

Don't get me wrong. I love my sister. She's a hoot. But as a Scorpio, she has a controlling side. She means well. But she micromanages. Nothing is going to ruin the good time she has taken care to plan for us. Take the schedule for Casinopalooza, for instance.

For a while she dwelt on Farmer H's plan to tour some antique stores while we were casino-hopping, and meet up with us farther down the road. It was almost as if she was worried about getting stuck with me for a couple of hours. Like she wouldn't be able to control me without my minder. Several different days she sent me a text, to make sure we had a plan for meeting up with him again. So I told her not to worry. Farmer H was not going to drive back home and leave me in her care.

"It's not that. You are welcome to ride with us on Saturday. But just so you know, we stay out late. We're not going to leave a casino to drive you all the way back to the hotel. If Farmer H can't find us, you'll have to stay until we're ready to go back."

Um. Kind of no problem. I stay up until 3:00, you know. And please, please don't make me spend extra time in a casino. Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha! Like I would want to go back early.

Karma was feeling a mite peckish on Friday night, it seems.

We had all gone together in A-Cad after checking into the hotel. We had four casinos to hit that night. And another four or five on Saturday. We didn't start out until 3:30. We had pockets full of money, plus free play credits for signing up for a player's card at each casino. Then we had to find something to eat that wouldn't take up too much of our gambling time. It was 12:30 a.m. when we started back to the hotel.

Farmer H missed an exit, so we meandered in a big loop to get back on the interstate. As we cruised along in the dark, dark, past-night...the ex-mayor made a chilling discovery.

"I don't have the car keys."

"Oh, you probably left them in OUR room when you stopped by."

"No. I had them. I remember clicking them on our car when we went out, right before we decided to go together."

"Stop being so dramatic! They're probably here on the floor. I bet they fell out of your pocket."

"No. I wasn't in my pockets in the car. I'm afraid I dropped them in the casino while I was getting money out of my pocket."

"Or maybe you laid them down on the counter when you got your ID for the player's card."

"You're not helping!"

"I'm sure casinos have a lost and found. Good news is...THEY'RE OPEN 24 HOURS A DAY! You can call and ask if somebody found your keys."

"They're not going to know if my keys are there."

"As much as they go around cleaning up and dumping ashtrays? Somebody is going to find them and turn them in.What's the worst that could happen? You call, and they say no. Right now you don't have them anyway."

"HM, can't Sis just use her keys?"

"I didn't bring my keys! We only need one set."

"Maybe there's a car dealer than can get you one if you know the VIN. But I don't know if they can do it on a Saturday."

"Just call."

On our way into our hotel room, after Sis and Ex-Mayor went on down the hall, Farmer H muttered, "They're not going to find those keys. Somebody probably threw them away."

"Who would throw away keys? That's crazy."

"Well, they'd kick them under a slot machine. Nobody's going to pick up keys in a casino."

Farmer H's phone rang. Ex-Mayor had located his keys. They were at the very first casino we visited. Farmer H said he'd be out in a few minutes. He'd drive Ex-Mayor to pick them up.

They got back to the hotel at 2:20 a.m.

Karma was licking her lips after this delectable treat.

No word from Sis.


fishducky said...

At least it wasn't Farmer H's fault!!

Sioux Roslawski said...

HM--Your sister is... unique? Different? What is the right adjective?

After this trip, I'm sure you gathered fodder for a month of posts...

Hillbilly Mom said...

Nope! Not this time. He was the go-to guy. Let the record show that he's usually in bed by 9:00. So he was pretty tired driving around at 2:00 a.m.

Sis is breathtaking!

I have a lot of stories. I'll probably put them on my not-as-secret blog. Yes. It will take a while to tell the tales. With a brief respite for Book Blurb Friday, of course.

Kathy's Klothesline said...

you sure they didn't plan this?

Hillbilly Mom said...

No. I swear I did not pick The Ex-Mayor's pocket and throw his car keys on the floor. I had reason to, but I did not. I'll tell about his shenanigans later, elsewhere.