Three-Ring Circus At The Grocery Store

Don't waste your money on entertainment! All you have to do is go to the grocery store. Where you will certainly spend more of that hard-earned money than you used to. 

I went to Country Mart on my errand day Thursday. I was so lucky to get the closest handicap parking space, and find a cart waiting for me when I stepped out of T-Hoe. That was about the end of my luck. As I wheeled my cart/walker in through the front double doors, making a right turn for the lottery machines first... I heard a guy talking behind me.

"Come on! I know you. You need to go to the bathroom. Not in the store!"

A quick glance revealed a guy in camo fatigue pants, and a sleeveless black t-shirt. He had a white pit-bull-looking dog on a leash. They went out. But not for good! As I shopped, I encountered them no less than five times! The guy gave the dog a long lead on his leash. The dog was well-behaved. I don't begrudge a person having a support dog in a store. They don't make me fear for my life.

The guy was talking to the dog the whole time. Not commands, just commentary. Which I suppose was comforting for the dog. "No. She don't want none of that. Mind your manners." Stuff like that. I was tempted to ask if the dog was in training, but I didn't want to intervene. Several people stopped to pet the dog.

"I'm getting him used to the store. This is where we will do our shopping. So he's learning the lay of the land. I don't usually let people pet him, but he isn't actually working right now. I didn't put his harness on. That's his clue that he's working. He loves people and being petted. So I don't mind right now."

The dog was clean and calm. He was not lunging on his leash. Just curious. Tail up and wagging. Being a short-haired, lean dog, it was easy to see that he still had his family jewels attached. I don't know why I thought support dogs would be neutered. I suppose because it would make them less excitable. Still, I did not mind having that dog in the store. It was just unusual.

Then I went to the bread aisle, which is in the back. There was an empty supply cart with three trays stacked in the wheels. And a gal sitting on the floor. Thank the Gummi Mary, she was not in front of the hot dog buns, English muffins, and Hawaiian bread that I wanted to buy. She was obviously done stocking. Just sitting there, acting busy pushing around items on the shelves. It was 3:45 p.m. I'm guessing she was sitting there out of sight, waiting for her work day to end. I don't know if she was a contractor, or a store employee. But such activity made me suspicious of her milking the clock.

When I checked out, the cashier seemed to have lost her mind. I set one of my three Diet Mountain Dew packs on the counter, telling her I had three. She scanned it, and I lifted it back into my cart/walker. But then she said, "Oh, no!" Something wrong with her signing onto the register. So I had to heft it out again for another scanning. And when she bagged Farmer H's two boxes of Little Debbie Zebra Cakes, she put them in like a complete idiot! You know how a plastic bag has the two handles, and the seam along the bottom? Most people would put a long box along that seam. But this gal put them perpendicular! Not even cattywompus, as if by accident. She had those boxes sideways in the bag. So I had to change them when I put them in T-Hoe's rear. Leaving them sideways was just asking for the corners to tear the bag.

You'd think a trip to the grocery store would be uneventful. But not for Mrs. HM.