I fear that there is a conspiracy afoot at the hands of The People Who Make Dry Erase Marker Whiteboard Cleaner.
The People Who Make Dry Erase Marker Whiteboard Cleaner are taking us for a ride. Driving us down a narrow bumpy winding road, no more than a pig trail, really, at slapdash speed, errant sapling limbs whacking the elbows we have poked out open windows in an effort to appear nonchalant. Like we don't really know what TPWMDEMWC are doing to us. Which rhymes with mewing.
TPWMDEMWC are selling a product that does not clean the whiteboard. A product that does not even leave the whiteboard in a neutral state. A product that makes the whiteboard dirtier! There! I said it! We all know it's a racket. But each time we purchase their product, we hold out a little glimmer of hope. A wishful think that this time will be different. That the spray inside that plastic bottle will leave the whiteboard as slick and smooth and shiny as the day it was hung. And we are sorely disappointed.
Don't fear, my fellow whiteboardians! Mrs. Hillbilly Mom has the solution. Stop throwing your good money down the rathole owned and operated as a not-very-amusing park by TPWMDEMWC. We're not gonna take it anymore. Not even those of you who are fortunate enough to waste your school district's money instead of your own. Allow me to quote a menacing dark avian with a penchant for rapping on chamber doors: NEVERMORE!
Use window cleaner.
Yes. The blue stuff. Generic, even. Window cleaner will do you right. I used to swear by Save A Lot baby wipes. But window cleaner is even better. I learned that when I finally erased my whiteboard last week and left it bare overnight. My custodian, Cus, whipped that whiteboard into shiny shipshape. When I inquired as to the method of those mad cleaning skillz, Cus revealed the secret that has eluded us for so long. Window cleaner. And being a giving sort, Cus hooked me up with my very own spray bottle full, and a giant roll of white paper towels.
I am now the Queen of Cleanness, as well as the Queen of Meanness. And still the Emperor of Hillmomba.