Competitivus For The Rest Of Us

The yearly gamefest after Christmas dinner began with Top the Top. It is a method of torture by which the gameplayer must set a top in motion, then put a connector on its axis, then use a magnetic grabber to set another, smaller top you've started spinning onto the first. It goes three tops high. It is impossible. No wonder the children of the seventies tuned out.

Mrs. Hillbilly Mom did not even try. After all, she misspent her youth trying to attain spinning perfection. No need to relive that frustrating time period.

Several requests were made for Mystery Date, which was in the game closet, but was vetoed by my nephew, who won a date with a dreamy fireman at Thanksgiving. I suppose it was a matter of been there, done that.

A suggestion of Fitzgerald's was made by one, though nobody took up the hue and cry. I have no picture of this one, but it is a card game involving three quarters and adding face values, with the winner taking all the quarters.

From that rejection, we proceeded to a poor man's HedBanz. Once upon a time, we played the actual game, but since it is not part of Hillbilly Mom's childhood board game stable, we had to improvise. That means names were written on paper and taped to the backs of the players.

I actually liked the poor man's version better. Because my niece could not cheat by looking at her reflection in the lenses of the glasses of the myopic. Take THAT, Kim Kardashian/Snow White. I guess you were schooled by SpiderMan, Elvis, the Easter Bunny, Dr. Phil, Scrooge, Rachel Ray, Ronald McDonald, Tiger Woods, Honey Boo Boo, and Elton John!

We're a cut-throat bunch when it comes to gaming.