One Blind Louse

Mrs. Hillbilly Mom is not a happy camper. In fact, she is a cantankerous camper. A blind cantankerous camper. It has been three weeks since she consulted with her optometrist, and forked over a pretty penny breathtaking tens of thousands of pennies for two new sets of lenses. Not even whole glasses. Lenses. Not frames. As of this typing, Mrs. Hillbilly Mom is still without bifocals.

Let's try a little experiament, shall we? Mrs. Hillbilly Mom is going to take off her two year old bifocals to finish this little entry. Good luck.

It's bad enought that the Glasses Wench took my newest set of frames in the latest attempt to make things right. At least I could seeout of the far part of those glasses. Now I am wearing my two year old bifocals so ca I can see at school to do my swork. Unfortunately, I cannot see the screen upon which my projector projects my textbook dvd. I have to take the bifocals off ofor that.

Did I mention tha tmy old bifocals are not quite square? Nowhere near as square as Mrs. Hillbilly Mom. One earpiece is about an inch higher than the other. So I suppose I tilt my head to compensate. My neck is stiffing me every day.

Oh, and did you know that sometimes a sign of wearing the wrong prescription of bifocals gives you a headache? It's true. Like Thenksgiving Say, when I sat for hours peeling boiled eggs for my world-famous deviled eggs. Of course another sign of wering the wrong bifocals is when you can't see a freakin' think unless its 12 inches in front of your face. Any other distnace, and it seems like what you're looking at is under water in one of shose big jars on a convenience styore counter, with a shot glass in the bottom for you to try and drop a quarter in, counting on the fact that your'e not a sciene teacher who knows about refraction of light wabes in water.

I wnat my bifocals, BY CRACKY!